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The Bare Knuckled Pundit
12-02-2008, 08:28 PM
In honor of Senator Hillary Clinton's introduction as President-Elect Obama's nominee for Secretary of State, I thought it might be nice to take a look at what we - and more importantly the President-Elect - might expect from a Secretary Clinton.

What worldview does she bring to the administration? What style of diplomacy might we expect from her? What personal panache or interpersonal communication skills does she bring to the table?

For a bit of insight into Secretary Clinton and her style, I thought we might take a look at a patently undiplomatic moment from the campaign trail this past April.

While Secretary of State Condalezza Rice's cool demeanor has earned her the nickname "the Ice Queen", given Clinton's legendary temper and hawkish views, one might expect "the Harpy", "the Kurgan" or "Obama's Valkyrie" to be whispered in diplomatic circles in the near future.

If nothing else, there's no doubt that Secretary Clinton will dramatically increase the testosterone level of the fledgling Obama administration.

That being said, join me, if you will, as we take a look back at "Candidate Strangelove Or How Hillary Learned to Ignore the Liberal Left and Love the Bomb".

April 22, 2008

Hillary the Hawk has done it again.

In the latest stop on the testosterone-fueled Blitzkrieg Express, Senator Hillary Clinton has upped the ante in the would-be-Commander-In-Chief tournament. Storming through Pennsylvania like Panzers through the Ardennes, Hillary paused briefly to refuel and make a last minute appeal to voters on Good Morning America this morning.

Casting aside the mamby-pamby faux hunter routine of John Kerry and leaving M1A1 Mike Dukkakis in the dust, Hillary has given her manliness quotient a steroid-packed shot in the arm by throwing the nuclear gauntlet in the face of Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and the mad mullahs in Tehran.

Queried by intrepid GMA anchor Chris Cuomo on her response to an Iranian nuclear attack on Israel, Obergruppenfuhrer Clinton replied in steely and unequivocal fashion. "I want the Iranians to know that if I'm the president, we will attack Iran," Clinton said.

"In the next 10 years, during which they might foolishly consider launching an attack on Israel, we would be able to totally obliterate them."

Regardless of the fact that the US already maintains the ability to “totally obliterate” Iran, the statement is shocking for two reasons.

First, in the past, Hillary has demurred from answering such questions on the grounds that it would be irresponsible to engage in the discussion of such hypothetical nightmare scenarios.

This coming from the candidate that insisted to voters they need her and not the neophyte Obama answering the red phone in the White House at 3am when visions of sugarplums are dancing through the sleepy heads of American children and evil is afoot.

Next, there is the starkly undiplomatic and provocative nature of the comment.

Such aggressive demarches are best made behind closed doors, not on the stage of a nationally televised morning news show. Initiating nuclear war in the Middle East is hardly what one expects to find between the latest spring fashions and Diane Sawyer’s tips for how to make your home Earth-friendly, after all.

Furthermore, this comes from one of the most vociferous critics of the Bush administration and its' unilateral and militarily-heavy-handed foreign policy. So much for rebuilding America’s image through engagement and diplomacy.

A billion Muslims be damned, light up the Big Board in the Pentagon and nuke Tehran already!

Where is George C. Scott when you need him?

In related news, the Clinton campaign has announced that Hillary will be reprising Slim Pickens’ role in “Dr. Strangelove” and will appear riding a nuclear bomb as it is dropped over Tehran in her next campaign ad.

This will be interspersed with footage of Barak Obama screaming like a 10 year old girl, tied to a railroad track wearing a pink gingham dress as a train driven by Mahmoud Ahmedinejad and Osama Bin Laden comes barreling down on him.

Say your prayers and stock your backyard bomb shelters, faithful readers! Stay tuned for further updates as events warrant and Hillary contemplates using the nuclear "football" in the ultimate high stakes game of geopolitical dodgeball!