Should age really matter?

[KitchenKitten99]

If two people really love each other, and are in love, should their age difference really be of concern? Other than the obvious needs of being legal, and what age the younger person is, I cannot really see much of a reason that age matters when two adults want to be together.

The scenario: Female is 29 and the male is 42. They have much more in common than most would think, and really, what they initially thought. Neither were actually looking for any kind of long-term relationship when they met, just casual dating and fun and they ended up falling in love.

However their parents and some of their friends still make an issue of the age difference of 14 years. Yes it is a lot in terms of life experience, but when they are together, they are at their happiest, and love each other for their differences and things in common. They enjoy most of the same things and really are very compatible from what I have seen.

what are your thoughts?

[Classact]

My wife is 17 years younger than me and we have been married almost 19 years. We get along very well because we have so much in common but the only problem I've had is she wanted to rear a family and now I'm 60 and have two teen aged sons (17/18) and that's quite a challenge but I wouldn't take it back given a chance.

[KitchenKitten99]

My wife is 17 years younger than me and we have been married almost 19 years. We get along very well because we have so much in common but the only problem I've had is she wanted to rear a family and now I'm 60 and have two teen aged sons (17/18) and that's quite a challenge but I wouldn't take it back given a chance.

Both of these people i know have already had kids from previous marriages (5 between the both of them, and all are under 13) and have no plans for more, especially since both are 'fixed', so to speak. There are no real plans for marriage as far as I know, but these days you never know with some couples.

[crin63]

Girls/women usually mature earlier than guys so some age difference probably evens hings out a bit in the maturity dept. After a woman is over age 25 I don't think its a problem but if she was 18 and he was 30 that would be a problem for me because she really has no idea what she is getting into at that age. My 2 cents.

[PostmodernProphet]

old man gropes young girl, says "you're only as young as you feel".......

[April15]

It is their business.

[Trinity]

My husband is 12 years younger then me. When I first met him neither him nor I was looking for a relationship. I had just gotten out of a bad one and was in no hurry for a repeat. And I was a little stand offish because of his age. He was 22, I was 34. Needless to say we found we had so much in common, we soon became best friends. One thing led to another, we got married, and it has been the best 4 years of my life! I wouldn't change it for the world.

[avatar4321]

Age is irrelevant. We are all eternal beings.

[Mugged Liberal]

Age is irrelevant. We are all eternal beings.

My wife is 15 years younger. I became a father for the first time at 48. after 30 years of marriage, I think the best is yet to come.

[emmett]

13 years difference, woman is 29? Hmmmm... No problem.

5 child instafamily? Hmmmmm... Potential problem.

[KitchenKitten99]

13 years difference, woman is 29? Hmmmm... No problem.

5 child instafamily? Hmmmmm... Potential problem.

The kids are only with the respective parents part of the time. His kids are only really there on weekends and a couple weeknights but the weeknights they are only there until 9pm or so, then they go back to their mom's because of school. Her kids are also in school, so they are with her every other weekend and a couple days during the week if she doesn't work a morning shift at work and she can drop them off herself in the morning or at daycare.

From what I have been told, the kids get along very well together and play nicely. His youngest is a boy, almost 5, and her two are 6 and 3, so they all play like peas in a pod because they like all the same stuff-cars/trucks, legos, superhero stuff, etc. The older two of his are 10 and 12 and will actually play well with the younger kids too. His kids adore her and often ask to come over just to hang out or go out and have fun.

I think as long as the couple is fine with everything as it is, then why should anyone else care as long as they are happy?

[glockmail]

My husband is 12 years younger then me. When I first met him neither him nor I was looking for a relationship. I had just gotten out of a bad one and was in no hurry for a repeat. And I was a little stand offish because of his age. He was 22, I was 34. Needless to say we found we had so much in common, we soon became best friends. One thing led to another, we got married, and it has been the best 4 years of my life! I wouldn't change it for the world.
Cougah! :laugh2:

You go girl!

[emmett]

The kids are only with the respective parents part of the time. His kids are only really there on weekends and a couple weeknights but the weeknights they are only there until 9pm or so, then they go back to their mom's because of school. Her kids are also in school, so they are with her every other weekend and a couple days during the week if she doesn't work a morning shift at work and she can drop them off herself in the morning or at daycare.

From what I have been told, the kids get along very well together and play nicely. His youngest is a boy, almost 5, and her two are 6 and 3, so they all play like peas in a pod because they like all the same stuff-cars/trucks, legos, superhero stuff, etc. The older two of his are 10 and 12 and will actually play well with the younger kids too. His kids adore her and often ask to come over just to hang out or go out and have fun.

I think as long as the couple is fine with everything as it is, then why should anyone else care as long as they are happy?


I agree. I stated that inappropriately! I meant to suggest that anytime an instafamily is created there are obsticles to overcome. This could actually work to cement the relationship with a much greater foundation actually. I just know it's tough based on what I have seen from past experience.

I became a single dad in the eighties. I never remarried for this exact reason. I could have been wrong however I just feel the blending of families was too high a task for us. I couldn't say that it does not work for others. Personally I wish them all the luck in the world. The difference of ages in the man and women however is no big deal to me. I think a girl wise who marries 10 or 12 years above herself in age. That would make them about even in maturity given that the female is on a normal course.

[Noir]

Age is nothing to do with anything imo, which seems to be the general thoughts of most in the topic

[5stringJeff]

At their age, I don't think it's an issue at all.

[emmett]

Should age really matter?


If you're dating a female member of my family it matters to me, otherwise i think it is your business.