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jimnyc
02-03-2010, 05:27 PM
At least I am when the wife returns from work this evening.

It snowed here last night, but only about an inch, and half of that melted before I even awoke this morning. I went out to warm up my truck so I could take my son to school and my wife to the train station. A moment later, my wife comes out and starts shoveling the front porch and sidewalk.

I told her along the lines of "what are you, an idiot? It's gonna be sunny here today and that tiny bit of snow will be gone in an hour or 2". She insisted I shovel the 2 millimeters of snow on the driveway and I told her I would do it when I returned. (Yeah right!).

Came back, parked my truck, and came inside. Now mind you, my computer room is on the second floor, so I don't know much of what goes on in front of my house and can't even hear the doorbell if someone rings it. But I did hear a rather large BANG about noon or so today.

Went to get my soon at about 2:30 this afternoon from school. Came out my front door and found my truck - with the front end inside my garage - and yes, the garage door was shut! The fucking thing was in park, and since our driveway is about a 25 degree incline, I always put the emergency brake on. Nonetheless, since I refused to shovel or put salt down, it somehow slid anyway and trashed our NEWLY installed garage door. We had it installed 2 years ago and it was quite expensive. The truck took out the entire lower half of the doors, and bent the hell out of the rails that the door glides on. Trust me, cannot be fixed, needs to be replaced.

So yep, I'm a dead man. The only thing on the positive side is that she works late on Wednesdays, so she won't be home till well after 10pm and hopefully it'll be very dark. She will either kill me in my sleep, or someone here will have to let me live with them very soon!

HogTrash
02-03-2010, 05:33 PM
Kill her first... :boom2::boobies:

Clear cut case of self-defense. :beer:

Trigg
02-03-2010, 05:58 PM
Things obviously work differently at your house.

Around here if hubby does anything dumb outside he's already mad and jumping up and down ranting and raving. I just stand there quietly and smirk.

On the other hand if I do something dumb I have to listen to "how the hell did you do something so stupid" about a million times, until it gets fixed, or I get ticked off and walk inside.

Kathianne
02-03-2010, 06:04 PM
Jim, it sucks to be you for the next hours. Good luck!

Mr. P
02-03-2010, 06:07 PM
So, how's the truck? :laugh2:

Binky
02-03-2010, 06:15 PM
Well Jim, pardon me while I :laugh2::laugh2::laugh2:my butt off.. Me, myself and I, would never, ever do anything so stupid.....:laugh2:

jimnyc
02-03-2010, 06:32 PM
Kill her first... :boom2::boobies:

Clear cut case of self-defense. :beer:

I would never even think of such a horrible thing! (I'm also a habitual liar)


Things obviously work differently at your house.

Around here if hubby does anything dumb outside he's already mad and jumping up and down ranting and raving. I just stand there quietly and smirk.

On the other hand if I do something dumb I have to listen to "how the hell did you do something so stupid" about a million times, until it gets fixed, or I get ticked off and walk inside.

My wife wears the pants in the family. She beat me down like a newly recruited Marine many years ago and turned me into a yes man. Ever see "The Wedding Singer"? "Somebody kill me please!"


Jim, it sucks to be you for the next hours. Good luck!

Yep, I'll need it.


So, how's the truck? :laugh2:

That was my first instinct, fuck the door, how's my truck! Not even a single scratch! 2004 Toyota 4 Runner with only 40k on it and almost screwed up without even being behind the wheel!


Well Jim, pardon me while I :laugh2::laugh2::laugh2:my butt off.. Me, myself and I, would never, ever do anything so stupid.....:laugh2:

Yeah, yeah, keep laughing! Can I move in with you when she tosses me out on my ass later? :laugh2:

Missileman
02-03-2010, 06:38 PM
At least I am when the wife returns from work this evening.

It snowed here last night, but only about an inch, and half of that melted before I even awoke this morning. I went out to warm up my truck so I could take my son to school and my wife to the train station. A moment later, my wife comes out and starts shoveling the front porch and sidewalk.

I told her along the lines of "what are you, an idiot? It's gonna be sunny here today and that tiny bit of snow will be gone in an hour or 2". She insisted I shovel the 2 millimeters of snow on the driveway and I told her I would do it when I returned. (Yeah right!).

Came back, parked my truck, and came inside. Now mind you, my computer room is on the second floor, so I don't know much of what goes on in front of my house and can't even hear the doorbell if someone rings it. But I did hear a rather large BANG about noon or so today.

Went to get my soon at about 2:30 this afternoon from school. Came out my front door and found my truck - with the front end inside my garage - and yes, the garage door was shut! The fucking thing was in park, and since our driveway is about a 25 degree incline, I always put the emergency brake on. Nonetheless, since I refused to shovel or put salt down, it somehow slid anyway and trashed our NEWLY installed garage door. We had it installed 2 years ago and it was quite expensive. The truck took out the entire lower half of the doors, and bent the hell out of the rails that the door glides on. Trust me, cannot be fixed, needs to be replaced.

So yep, I'm a dead man. The only thing on the positive side is that she works late on Wednesdays, so she won't be home till well after 10pm and hopefully it'll be very dark. She will either kill me in my sleep, or someone here will have to let me live with them very soon!

She doesn't know it was in park and that it slipped downhill into the door...you might try, "jumped out of park somehow and rolled into the garage" and even call Toyota to make a complaint (in front of her of course).

With all the news about sticking gas pedals and Toyotas a slipping shifter doesn't sound all that far-fetched.

Gaffer
02-03-2010, 07:21 PM
Simple, you shoveled the snow and the left over water turned to ice and the truck slid down the drive way. She doesn't have to know you didn't shovel the snow.

darin
02-03-2010, 07:33 PM
Ttiwwop

glockmail
02-03-2010, 07:41 PM
25% grade? Shit I thought mine was steep at 18%.

jimnyc
02-03-2010, 07:57 PM
Ttiwwop


25% grade? Shit I thought mine was steep at 18%.

Honestly, I kinda made that up, I just know its steep and I break my ass on the ice/snow all the time. I also know a damned truck with the emergency brake on shouldn't start sliding out of the clear blue sky!!

Here is a picture from my front porch a few years back when I had my Mustang. You can see how much of the car "disappears" alongside the wall which is at lawn level.

http://i47.tinypic.com/ixxvd5.jpg

Here's a shot of the garage door from today. It only looks scuzzy right now because we had a few floods and I haven't had a chance to power wash the growth from the water yet. And the photos don't do the extent of the damage any justice.

http://i45.tinypic.com/29n9zrr.jpg

Another angled shot from outside the garage door

http://i50.tinypic.com/14tx2t4.jpg

A shot from inside showing how far it was pushed in

http://i49.tinypic.com/dm8hop.jpg

A shot of the bent rails and rollers for the door, both bent beyond repair. Can't see it too awfully well as my cell phone camera sucks!

http://i45.tinypic.com/95pesh.jpg

This is the lowest horizontal panel, which is now cracked and about to fall off. Mind you, I kicked at the door for awhile thinking like a jackass that maybe I could push it back into place, and sort of moved the panel around a bit to look less broken in the hopes the wifey wouldn't notice! LOL

http://i48.tinypic.com/25a67fm.jpg

chesswarsnow
02-03-2010, 08:05 PM
Sorry bout that,


1. Its just the bottom panel, shouldn't be all that expensive to fix.
2. Couple hundred bucks.
3. Tuff break there thou.
4. That isn't all that steep, looks to me, maybe 7 degree's, strange how that could even happen, and how could anyone know that it could?
5. Maybe pull your car up real close to it, tell her your cars battery needs to be charged over noght.
6. Put the charger on it.
7. So she can't get a good look at it, then call a door guy tomorrow.
8. Thats what I would consider doing.
9. Damn Jimbo she's got you whooped mon,...!
10. Gotta find a way to change that my man,.,...


Regards,
SirJamesofTexas

glockmail
02-03-2010, 08:21 PM
You ought to be able to get a replacement panel on a two year old door. You should fix that flooding problem. I remember you saying something about that before. Are you next to a creek or is the problem just localized?

jimnyc
02-03-2010, 08:40 PM
Sorry bout that,


1. Its just the bottom panel, shouldn't be all that expensive to fix.
2. Couple hundred bucks.
3. Tuff break there thou.
4. That isn't all that steep, looks to me, maybe 7 degree's, strange how that could even happen, and how could anyone know that it could?
5. Maybe pull your car up real close to it, tell her your cars battery needs to be charged over noght.
6. Put the charger on it.
7. So she can't get a good look at it, then call a door guy tomorrow.
8. Thats what I would consider doing.
9. Damn Jimbo she's got you whooped mon,...!
10. Gotta find a way to change that my man,.,...


Regards,
SirJamesofTexas


You ought to be able to get a replacement panel on a two year old door. You should fix that flooding problem. I remember you saying something about that before. Are you next to a creek or is the problem just localized?

You guys might be correct about being able to replace the first 2 rows of panels, but it appears all the interior hinges and rails will need to be replaced too.

No creek within miles of my house. Apparently, which we were unaware of, and it was not disclosed when we purchased the home in '99, there is a history of flooding here from heavy rains. The 2 houses on one side have built up there yards on angles to drain the water, as did the 2 homes on the other side. Needless to say, all the rain builds up in our yard and eventually overflowed into our basement and garage. It was about 3-4 feet deep in our basement at times, lost our washer/dryer and hot water heater 2x apiece, and Diana's Maxima was totaled due to flood damage as it was in the garage during one flood.

We paid $50k last year to have a HUGE well dug into our backyard, and drainage pipes around the entire house. 2 industrial sized sump pumps were built adjacent to the well on the side of our house, with dedicated electric, and a drainage line to our street - then all the way down the street to the sewer system. The flooding problem has been solved as we've had torrential downpours since and not a drop of water anymore.

I'm glad I never cleaned the panels on the garage door now, would have wasted my time!

Jeff
02-03-2010, 08:54 PM
:laugh2::laugh2::laugh2:

Nice Job James, damn I would hate to be in your shoes :laugh2:

glockmail
02-03-2010, 09:54 PM
You guys might be correct about being able to replace the first 2 rows of panels, but it appears all the interior hinges and rails will need to be replaced too.

No creek within miles of my house. Apparently, which we were unaware of, and it was not disclosed when we purchased the home in '99, there is a history of flooding here from heavy rains. The 2 houses on one side have built up there yards on angles to drain the water, as did the 2 homes on the other side. Needless to say, all the rain builds up in our yard and eventually overflowed into our basement and garage. It was about 3-4 feet deep in our basement at times, lost our washer/dryer and hot water heater 2x apiece, and Diana's Maxima was totaled due to flood damage as it was in the garage during one flood.

We paid $50k last year to have a HUGE well dug into our backyard, and drainage pipes around the entire house. 2 industrial sized sump pumps were built adjacent to the well on the side of our house, with dedicated electric, and a drainage line to our street - then all the way down the street to the sewer system. The flooding problem has been solved as we've had torrential downpours since and not a drop of water anymore.

I'm glad I never cleaned the panels on the garage door now, would have wasted my time!

Those rails and rollers are fairly cheap. You can probably order them at Home Depot or wherever you got the door. Take some photos of the damage and bring them down with you. The only real tricky part about replacing parts is the springs. Don't mess with that shit.

Abbey Marie
02-03-2010, 10:57 PM
Mama knows best!

Mr. P
02-03-2010, 10:57 PM
Those rails and rollers are fairly cheap. You can probably order them at Home Depot or wherever you got the door. Take some photos of the damage and bring them down with you. The only real tricky part about replacing parts is the springs. Don't mess with that shit.

Good advice...I've adjusted mine BUT if you make one lil mistake those springs can KILL you! Really!

SassyLady
02-03-2010, 11:29 PM
Those rails and rollers are fairly cheap. You can probably order them at Home Depot or wherever you got the door. Take some photos of the damage and bring them down with you. The only real tricky part about replacing parts is the springs. Don't mess with that shit.

My stepson has a huge scar on his face and he almost lost his eye because one of those springs slipped off when he was trying to fix his garage.

Jim.........I don't know what type of insurance you have (homeowners or auto) but it wouldn't hurt to find out if either of them would replace the entire door. If you have to pay something (deductible) then you might as well get a new door.

Good luck with the wife.........I personally never got mad at my husband when he screwed up anything. :eek: (fingers crossed behind my back).

crin63
02-04-2010, 01:18 AM
I live by this: She'll get over it or she won't! If she does great, if she doesn't great! Either way my life will go on!

SassyLady
02-04-2010, 01:22 AM
I live by this: She'll get over it or she won't! If she does great, if she doesn't great! Either way my life will go on!

Yeah ... my husband always say "well, it is what it is" and then shrugs.......and then gives me this little goofy grin that I can't resist and all is forgiven!! :beer:

Mr. P
02-04-2010, 01:32 AM
I live by this: She'll get over it or she won't! If she does great, if she doesn't great! Either way my life will go on!

Yeah, I'll bet that's what John Wayne Bobbitt thought too. :eek:

crin63
02-04-2010, 01:37 AM
Yeah, I'll bet that's what John Wayne Bobbitt thought too. :eek:

My wife would never get angry over stuff. Stuff can be replaced and after all its just stuff. The only time I get in a little trouble is if I really say something stupid and hurt her feelings but that seldom happens.

Sitarro
02-04-2010, 03:42 AM
Good advice...I've adjusted mine BUT if you make one lil mistake those springs can KILL you! Really!

I've changed the springs on numerous doors, never had a problem. When the door is open there isn't any tension on them, that's when you mess with them. It is definitely a good idea to put the safety cable running through the spring...... if a spring breaks, which many do eventually, it could definitely do a lot of damage to anything it hits.

HogTrash
02-04-2010, 07:10 AM
Yeah, I'll bet that's what John Wayne Bobbitt thought too. :eek:I've spent years waiting for women to forget about Mrs Bobbitts savage form of revenge in hope it would never be used

on some poor guy again and here you go and freshin it in their sick twisted little feminine minds. :scared::death::mad::wtf:

glockmail
02-04-2010, 10:00 AM
My wife would never get angry over stuff. Stuff can be replaced and after all its just stuff. The only time I get in a little trouble is if I really say something stupid and hurt her feelings but that seldom happens.

Good advice. My wife has wrecked two cars and each time thought I was going to have a fit. Each time I said the same thing; it's just "stuff". :laugh2:

First one was my old 72 Ford with 185,000 miles on it that I had since high school, all through college and then for about two years since it ran good and I wanted to save for a home down payment instead of a new car. She spun out on an ice coated viaduct in downtown Syracuse and ended up against the median facing the wrong way. Two lesser vehicles plowed into her and had to be towed away, and my old Ford was still idling. I had to use a sledgehammer to open the hood up and of course looked like hell but other than that it was fine. I was glad to get rid of it actually.

Second was a '92 Explorer six weeks old, and again a winter driving episode. I had just told her to be careful since 4WD can get you going but it won't help you stop any better. She was 5 months pregnant with our son and hit a tree doing 50. She was scraped up a bit and sore but an ultrasound told us that our son was OK. He's got a little spot on his head that doesn't grow hair and sort of a wise-ass at 17 but other than that is perfect. I went to the wrecker yard to sign off on the car. The hood was bent 180 degrees, the engine had dropped to the ground and the bumper was in a huge Vee, with the framed crumpled up perfectly like an aluminum can. The passenger compartment was completely intact. It was a picture perfect controlled destruction and a testament to good design.

chloe
02-04-2010, 10:17 AM
Why didn't you just shovel the snow? I don't get that part. Shrug.

crin63
02-04-2010, 10:39 AM
Praise God your wife and son were okay. 50 into a tree is rough. I praise God for keeping my wife and children safe.

I've been in 2 auto accidents and I think that sounds worse. I rolled my truck on the frwy doing 70-75mph, it was like being in a blender and I was rear-ended while stopped and the car that hit me was doing about 25-30mph.


Good advice. My wife has wrecked two cars and each time thought I was going to have a fit. Each time I said the same thing; it's just "stuff". :laugh2:

First one was my old 72 Ford with 185,000 miles on it that I had since high school, all through college and then for about two years since it ran good and I wanted to save for a home down payment instead of a new car. She spun out on an ice coated viaduct in downtown Syracuse and ended up against the median facing the wrong way. Two lesser vehicles plowed into her and had to be towed away, and my old Ford was still idling. I had to use a sledgehammer to open the hood up and of course looked like hell but other than that it was fine. I was glad to get rid of it actually.

Second was a '92 Explorer six weeks old, and again a winter driving episode. I had just told her to be careful since 4WD can get you going but it won't help you stop any better. She was 5 months pregnant with our son and hit a tree doing 50. She was scraped up a bit and sore but an ultrasound told us that our son was OK. He's got a little spot on his head that doesn't grow hair and sort of a wise-ass at 17 but other than that is perfect. I went to the wrecker yard to sign off on the car. The hood was bent 180 degrees, the engine had dropped to the ground and the bumper was in a huge Vee, with the framed crumpled up perfectly like an aluminum can. The passenger compartment was completely intact. It was a picture perfect controlled destruction and a testament to good design.

HogTrash
02-04-2010, 11:06 AM
You will survive!.........................................I think?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pmT6udys8Tc

DragonStryk72
02-04-2010, 11:49 AM
At least I am when the wife returns from work this evening.

It snowed here last night, but only about an inch, and half of that melted before I even awoke this morning. I went out to warm up my truck so I could take my son to school and my wife to the train station. A moment later, my wife comes out and starts shoveling the front porch and sidewalk.

I told her along the lines of "what are you, an idiot? It's gonna be sunny here today and that tiny bit of snow will be gone in an hour or 2". She insisted I shovel the 2 millimeters of snow on the driveway and I told her I would do it when I returned. (Yeah right!).

Came back, parked my truck, and came inside. Now mind you, my computer room is on the second floor, so I don't know much of what goes on in front of my house and can't even hear the doorbell if someone rings it. But I did hear a rather large BANG about noon or so today.

Went to get my soon at about 2:30 this afternoon from school. Came out my front door and found my truck - with the front end inside my garage - and yes, the garage door was shut! The fucking thing was in park, and since our driveway is about a 25 degree incline, I always put the emergency brake on. Nonetheless, since I refused to shovel or put salt down, it somehow slid anyway and trashed our NEWLY installed garage door. We had it installed 2 years ago and it was quite expensive. The truck took out the entire lower half of the doors, and bent the hell out of the rails that the door glides on. Trust me, cannot be fixed, needs to be replaced.

So yep, I'm a dead man. The only thing on the positive side is that she works late on Wednesdays, so she won't be home till well after 10pm and hopefully it'll be very dark. She will either kill me in my sleep, or someone here will have to let me live with them very soon!

Actually, you're not alone. My dad did this same thing when I was a kid(minus the snow and ice, so there's at least some extenuating circumstances for you), and yet, I went to his last AA anniversairy not long ago, so I doubt your wife will kill you. Oh no, she's not letting you off that easily.

glockmail
02-04-2010, 12:12 PM
Praise God your wife and son were okay. 50 into a tree is rough. I praise God for keeping my wife and children safe.

I've been in 2 auto accidents and I think that sounds worse. I rolled my truck on the frwy doing 70-75mph, it was like being in a blender and I was rear-ended while stopped and the car that hit me was doing about 25-30mph.

Believe me I thank God every day for both of them. Good thing you weren't driving a Kia. :salute:

Binky
02-04-2010, 12:23 PM
Jimmy, sorry pal, no can do. Me, myself and I take up enough space around here. Your ass would only get in my way....:laugh2::laugh2:

Binky
02-04-2010, 12:33 PM
Yeah ... my husband always say "well, it is what it is" and then shrugs.......and then gives me this little goofy grin that I can't resist and all is forgiven!! :beer:


That's sweet, and he knows it will work......He's playin' ya girl.....:laugh2::laugh2:

Binky
02-04-2010, 12:35 PM
Yeah, I'll bet that's what John Wayne Bobbitt thought too. :eek:


:laugh2::laugh2::laugh2: I bet his hurts more.......

Binky
02-04-2010, 12:38 PM
I've spent years waiting for women to forget about Mrs Bobbitts savage form of revenge in hope it would never be used

on some poor guy again and here you go and freshin it in their sick twisted little feminine minds. :scared::death::mad::wtf:

(Here's a secret for ya....I've never forgotten) :laugh2:

SassyLady
02-04-2010, 03:20 PM
(Here's a secret for ya....I've never forgotten) :laugh2:

Hasn't anyone heard........men can't remember and women can't forget?

Binky
02-04-2010, 03:28 PM
Hasn't anyone heard........men can't remember and women can't forget?

:laugh2: That is a very true statement....:coffee:

Mr. P
02-04-2010, 03:29 PM
Hasn't anyone heard........men can't remember and women can't forget?

Women even remember shit that never happened. Cept in their mind. :laugh2:

chloe
02-04-2010, 03:49 PM
(Here's a secret for ya....I've never forgotten) :laugh2:

:beer:

SassyLady
02-04-2010, 04:14 PM
Women even remember shit that never happened. Cept in their mind. :laugh2:

Well, when you men evolve a little more you'll be able to read our minds and this will be a moot point! :laugh2: :slap:

Binky
02-04-2010, 05:30 PM
Women even remember shit that never happened. Cept in their mind. :laugh2:

You're just so, so, so funny P.:lame2:

Binky
02-04-2010, 05:31 PM
Well, when you men evolve a little more you'll be able to read our minds and this will be a moot point! :laugh2: :slap:

They aren't going to evolve anymore than they already have. They are neanderthals, the whole lot of them.....:laugh2::laugh2:

HogTrash
02-04-2010, 07:07 PM
(Here's a secret for ya....I've never forgotten) :laugh2:Ohhh, you're a bad one Binky.:dev2:

SassyLady
02-04-2010, 07:59 PM
They aren't going to evolve anymore than they already have. They are neanderthals, the whole lot of them.....:laugh2::laugh2:

Oh man........you just ruined my fantasy Binky! :slap:

HogTrash
02-04-2010, 08:13 PM
Oh man........you just ruined my fantasy Binky! :slap:She revived my nightmare! :scared:

crin63
02-04-2010, 10:25 PM
Well, when you men evolve a little more you'll be able to read our minds and this will be a moot point! :laugh2: :slap:


They aren't going to evolve anymore than they already have. They are neanderthals, the whole lot of them.....:laugh2::laugh2:

Yep, I'm a good old fashioned knuckle dragger and darn proud of it too!!!

Mr. P
02-04-2010, 10:49 PM
Has anyone else noticed we haven't heard a peep from poor Jim today.

Maybe she did kill him!

HogTrash
02-05-2010, 09:15 AM
Has anyone else noticed we haven't heard a peep from poor Jim today.

Maybe she did kill him!Let us all hold hands and pray...

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to pay our last respects to Jim...He should have known better...Duhhh...Amen.

The bar is now open. :wine::cheers2::beer::alcoholic::bye1:

CSM
02-05-2010, 10:58 AM
Well, when you men evolve a little more you'll be able to read our minds and this will be a moot point! :laugh2: :slap:

Already tried to read women's minds....there was nothing there to read.

Mr. P
02-05-2010, 11:31 AM
Already tried to read women's minds....there was nothing there to read.

Well, somebody had to say it! :thumb:

I am immediately issuing flak vests to any man who wants to stand his ground for what is sure to come in the next day or so. Intel says the coming attack could last through Sunday. That is all. :salute:

CSM
02-05-2010, 12:22 PM
Well, somebody had to say it! :thumb:

I am immediately issuing flak vests to any man who wants to stand his ground for what is sure to come in the next day or so. Intel says the coming attack could last through Sunday. That is all. :salute:

You are hereby appointed S-3 for this operation. We need to assume our standard defensive posture and reinforce the perimeter. Be usre to add some claymores!

CSM
02-05-2010, 12:40 PM
By the way, I'll be in my bunker if anyone needs me.

SassyLady
02-05-2010, 02:02 PM
Already tried to read women's minds....there was nothing there to read.

One would have to have a brain before attempting to read another's .... I suggest you move out smartly Sgt. Major!!!! LOL!

SassyLady
02-05-2010, 02:03 PM
By the way, I'll be in my bunker if anyone needs me.

Well, you do have a brain after all.................. LOL!!!!

CSM
02-05-2010, 02:22 PM
Well, you do have a brain after all.................. LOL!!!!

Indeed, which makes my original statement all the more telling!

PostmodernProphet
02-05-2010, 02:29 PM
no word from Jim in two days....do you think we should call the police?.....

chloe
02-05-2010, 02:38 PM
no word from Jim in two days....do you think we should call the police?.....

he posted at 2am this morning in the the lounge he has insomnia right?

http://www.debatepolicy.com/showthread.php?t=26410

Abbey Marie
02-05-2010, 02:42 PM
he posted at 2am this morning in the the lounge he has insomnia right?

http://www.debatepolicy.com/showthread.php?t=26410

No wonder he's unable to sleep. Like I tell my husband sometimes: "If you (fill in the blank), you'd better sleep with one eye open.
:coffee:

glockmail
02-05-2010, 02:50 PM
no word from Jim in two days....do you think we should call the police?..... He sent me a PM this morning just before 10.

Binky
02-05-2010, 05:22 PM
Ohhh, you're a bad one Binky.:dev2:

In your eyes, maybe, but in mine, I'm a jewel in denial....:laugh2::laugh2:

Binky
02-05-2010, 05:24 PM
Oh man........you just ruined my fantasy Binky! :slap:

Sorry to burst your bubble, but I speaketh the truth......:laugh2:

Binky
02-05-2010, 05:27 PM
She revived my nightmare! :scared:

If you behave yourself, and be the sweet man I know you can be, then you shouldn't have to worry about the Bobbit syndromn.....:laugh2::laugh2:

Jeff
02-05-2010, 05:30 PM
If you behave yourself, and be the sweet man I know you can be, then you shouldn't have to worry about the Bobbit syndromn.....:laugh2::laugh2:

Woman are very unpredictable a couple weeks a month no matter how good ya are :laugh2:

I sleep with 1 eye open just for this reason

Binky
02-05-2010, 05:31 PM
Yep, I'm a good old fashioned knuckle dragger and darn proud of it too!!!

:laugh2::laugh2::laugh2: We all have to be proud of something. You ought to fit in right well the the knuckle draggers I see meandering thru Walmarts....

Binky
02-05-2010, 05:33 PM
Has anyone else noticed we haven't heard a peep from poor Jim today.

Maybe she did kill him!


Could be his ass is draggin' cuz she beat it to a pulp....:laugh2::laugh2:

Binky
02-05-2010, 05:34 PM
Let us all hold hands and pray...

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to pay our last respects to Jim...He should have known better...Duhhh...Amen.

The bar is now open. :wine::cheers2::beer::alcoholic::bye1:


:laugh2::laugh2::laugh2:

Jeff
02-05-2010, 05:36 PM
:laugh2::laugh2::laugh2: We all have to be proud of something. You ought to fit in right well the the knuckle draggers I see meandering thru Walmarts....

Walmart, LOL, I sit out front and let the ol lady go in, I watch the little hotties going in and out, mainly cause I hate shopping, and the wife has to look at everything in the damn store, So ya don't see me in there, :laugh2:

Binky
02-05-2010, 05:38 PM
One would have to have a brain before attempting to read another's .... I suggest you move out smartly Sgt. Major!!!! LOL!

:laugh2::laugh2:They don't need a brain for what they are always thinking about....:coffee:

Binky
02-05-2010, 05:42 PM
Woman are very unpredictable a couple weeks a month no matter how good ya are :laugh2:

I sleep with 1 eye open just for this reason

Not this one....those glorious days are all over and done with for me....:coffee:

Binky
02-05-2010, 05:47 PM
Walmart, LOL, I sit out front and let the ol lady go in, I watch the little hotties going in and out, mainly cause I hate shopping, and the wife has to look at everything in the damn store, So ya don't see me in there, :laugh2:

I'm in a small town, and our Walmarts has customers from surrounding towns...You wouldn't believe the neanderthals I see draggin' a leg behind them, so to speak. And at high tourist times, holiday times etc, look out, as the knuckle draggers come out of their rocks to spend their welfare money there. I hate that store.....

I hate shoppin' as well and would much rather spend time on here playing with peoples heads.... Damn sight more interesting....

Jeff
02-05-2010, 05:47 PM
Not this one....those glorious days are all over and done with for me....:coffee:

The ol lady just had some surgery to end all that also but she is still maybe even worse with the emotions , last couple of weeks I just don't sleep :laugh2:

Binky
02-05-2010, 05:53 PM
The ol lady just had some surgery to end all that also but she is still maybe even worse with the emotions , last couple of weeks I just don't sleep :laugh2:

Pop a pill to go nighty, night.............then you won't have to hear her emotions run the gammet....

Jeff
02-05-2010, 05:55 PM
Pop a pill to go nighty, night.............then you won't have to hear her emotions run the gammet....

but I may wake up a few inches shorter :laugh2:

Mr. P
02-05-2010, 06:57 PM
You are hereby appointed S-3 for this operation. We need to assume our standard defensive posture and reinforce the perimeter. Be usre to add some claymores!

Earlier I ordered 250 rounds of HCDDS-50 (AB) distributed to each of 10 perimeter mortar positions. As you know, the HCDDS-50 (AB) round or "Hershey Chocolate double dipped strawberry Air-Burst" round will shower 50 Hershey Chocolate double dipped strawberries from each Air-Burst. This alone should keep the enemy well outside the perimeter and congregated in a clutch or what could be called a hen party.

In the event any enemy stray from the group (hen party) and penetrate the first wire of the perimeter, I've ordered M&M PL-1000 claymores placed every 20 feet around the perimeter. These weapons will deliver 1000 M&M's Plain/ea. over a range 50 feet wide.

All guard positions have been supplied with 10 boxes of KX-1 (Kleenex) in preparation of the sobbing surrender.

Binky
02-05-2010, 07:32 PM
but I may wake up a few inches shorter :laugh2:

:laugh2: Then one day you will wake up as a puddle......:laugh2::laugh2:

Gaffer
02-05-2010, 07:41 PM
Earlier I ordered 250 rounds of HCDDS-50 (AB) distributed to each of 10 perimeter mortar positions. As you know, the HCDDS-50 (AB) round or "Hershey Chocolate double dipped strawberry Air-Burst" round will shower 50 Hershey Chocolate double dipped strawberries from each Air-Burst. This alone should keep the enemy well outside the perimeter and congregated in a clutch or what could be called a hen party.

In the event any enemy stray from the group (hen party) and penetrate the first wire of the perimeter, I've ordered M&M PL-1000 claymores placed every 20 feet around the perimeter. These weapons will deliver 1000 M&M's Plain/ea. over a range 50 feet wide.

All guard positions have been supplied with 10 boxes of KX-1 (Kleenex) in preparation of the sobbing surrender.

You realize this would be a great Monty Python skit.

chloe
02-06-2010, 06:15 PM
Woman are very unpredictable a couple weeks a month no matter how good ya are :laugh2:

I sleep with 1 eye open just for this reason

Yeah women are moody, but alot of it is hormones and it does make you feel crabby sometimes.

avatar4321
02-06-2010, 09:25 PM
So now that Jim is dead, who owns the board?

Mr. P
02-06-2010, 10:18 PM
You realize this would be a great Monty Python skit.

Ya think so? Hey, maybe I could make a buck!

Gaffer
02-06-2010, 10:19 PM
Ya think so? Hey, maybe I could make a buck!

You tube awaits your posting.

Mr. P
02-06-2010, 10:25 PM
You tube awaits your posting.

I have been wanting to explore posting on you tube.

Gaffer
02-06-2010, 10:29 PM
I have been wanting to explore posting on you tube.

You tube bans sex and conservative points of view, other than that anything goes.

jackass
02-06-2010, 11:47 PM
Jim youre a dumbass!! hahaha

Jeff
02-07-2010, 09:18 AM
So now that Jim is dead, who owns the board?

I think his wife has it for sale, but no price has been decided on yet, she is getting prices on getting the garage door fixed first :laugh2:

gabosaurus
02-07-2010, 12:14 PM
I am waiting for the "Dead Administrator" sketch.

"Jim's not dead. He's resting. Beautiful plumage eh?"

Abbey Marie
02-07-2010, 01:52 PM
I am waiting for the "Dead Administrator" sketch.

"Jim's not dead. He's resting. Beautiful plumage eh?"

He's glued to the chair!

CSM
02-08-2010, 07:52 AM
Earlier I ordered 250 rounds of HCDDS-50 (AB) distributed to each of 10 perimeter mortar positions. As you know, the HCDDS-50 (AB) round or "Hershey Chocolate double dipped strawberry Air-Burst" round will shower 50 Hershey Chocolate double dipped strawberries from each Air-Burst. This alone should keep the enemy well outside the perimeter and congregated in a clutch or what could be called a hen party.

In the event any enemy stray from the group (hen party) and penetrate the first wire of the perimeter, I've ordered M&M PL-1000 claymores placed every 20 feet around the perimeter. These weapons will deliver 1000 M&M's Plain/ea. over a range 50 feet wide.

All guard positions have been supplied with 10 boxes of KX-1 (Kleenex) in preparation of the sobbing surrender.


Well done! We'll keep the 500 gallon ICDs (Ice Cream Dispenser) in reserve as well as the CF/TJ M-30 (Chick Flick/Tear Jerker Movie -30 each).