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jimnyc
05-21-2010, 05:06 PM
I started thinking lately about what I am giving this world and what I'll be remembered for. I guess everyone wants some sort of legacy to pass along or to leave a mark on things that future generations will talk about. How do we accomplish that? How does a person become "valued" and worthy of being "passed down" through generations. Surely there have been millions of great people that have passed on legacies that even those of us not in their families get to enjoy. Millions upon millions of others do so within their families. Some leave money, companies, property, stocks... Some raise 10 kids while working 3 part time menial jobs, parents raise children on their own, some deal with and get stronger because of adversity or diversity.

Some of us can count their accomplishments with their fingers, thought not for a lack of trying. I want to be able to leave something for my son to grow on and from. Maybe I'm just jealous, which I know is wrong. I guess I just sometimes wish I had more to offer my son. The best I can do right now is take what I have learned from this shitty world, both accomplishments and hard learned mistakes, and try to make him a better man than I ever was. I always feel like I'm not doing enough. Is that a typical reaction of a parent or is it just me? But if a person just goes through an "average" life, what is it they are passing down? Excuse the rambling, it's hard for me to put this into words!

SassyLady
05-21-2010, 06:24 PM
I started thinking lately about what I am giving this world and what I'll be remembered for. I guess everyone wants some sort of legacy to pass along or to leave a mark on things that future generations will talk about. How do we accomplish that? How does a person become "valued" and worthy of being "passed down" through generations. Surely there have been millions of great people that have passed on legacies that even those of us not in their families get to enjoy. Millions upon millions of others do so within their families. Some leave money, companies, property, stocks... Some raise 10 kids while working 3 part time menial jobs, parents raise children on their own, some deal with and get stronger because of adversity or diversity.

Some of us can count their accomplishments with their fingers, thought not for a lack of trying. I want to be able to leave something for my son to grow on and from. Maybe I'm just jealous, which I know is wrong. I guess I just sometimes wish I had more to offer my son. The best I can do right now is take what I have learned from this shitty world, both accomplishments and hard learned mistakes, and try to make him a better man than I ever was. I always feel like I'm not doing enough. Is that a typical reaction of a parent or is it just me? But if a person just goes through an "average" life, what is it they are passing down? Excuse the rambling, it's hard for me to put this into words!

Jim, if you do nothing else but raise a young man to have a good set of values then you have probably done more for the world than those who have left a legacy of millions, a new cure for some disease, etc.

Sometimes people get so focused on creating the legacy that they forget they are molding a young person's mind and emotions and I believe that good, strong, intelligent humans are what this world needs right now.

So .... keep working on setting the example of what a good person is and you'll be leaving a great legacy.

Nukeman
05-21-2010, 06:29 PM
Jim, if you do nothing else but raise a young man to have a good set of values then you have probably done more for the world than those who have left a legacy of millions, a new cure for some disease, etc.

Sometimes people get so focused on creating the legacy that they forget they are molding a young person's mind and emotions and I believe that good, strong, intelligent humans are what this world needs right now.

So .... keep working on setting the example of what a good person is and you'll be leaving a great legacy.You took the words right out of my "keyboard":beer:

I concur completely. the best legacy a man can leave is a strong family with convictions and honor!

That in itself tells the world what type of man you were in life by how your children act and treat their children!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:thumb:

chloe
05-21-2010, 07:54 PM
I started thinking lately about what I am giving this world and what I'll be remembered for. I guess everyone wants some sort I guess I just sometimes wish I had more to offer my son. The best I can do right now is take what I have learned from this shitty world, both accomplishments and hard learned mistakes, and try to make him a better man than I ever was. I always feel like I'm not doing enough. Is that a typical reaction of a parent or is it just me? But if a person just goes through an "average" life, what is it they are passing down? Excuse the rambling, it's hard for me to put this into words!


Well I am just average, you can offer your personal values and insights, your sense of humor, coping skills, and you can offer love and understanding, relating and encouragement, getting to know who your kid is outside of you, what his thoughts and interests are.

You can offer appreciation for the differences he has that makes him unique and original, and your legacy will be the way he values and appreciates his life and the lives of others.
:beer:

82Marine89
05-21-2010, 10:26 PM
I started thinking lately about what I am giving this world and what I'll be remembered for. I guess everyone wants some sort of legacy to pass along or to leave a mark on things that future generations will talk about. How do we accomplish that? How does a person become "valued" and worthy of being "passed down" through generations. Surely there have been millions of great people that have passed on legacies that even those of us not in their families get to enjoy. Millions upon millions of others do so within their families. Some leave money, companies, property, stocks... Some raise 10 kids while working 3 part time menial jobs, parents raise children on their own, some deal with and get stronger because of adversity or diversity.

Some of us can count their accomplishments with their fingers, thought not for a lack of trying. I want to be able to leave something for my son to grow on and from. Maybe I'm just jealous, which I know is wrong. I guess I just sometimes wish I had more to offer my son. The best I can do right now is take what I have learned from this shitty world, both accomplishments and hard learned mistakes, and try to make him a better man than I ever was. I always feel like I'm not doing enough. Is that a typical reaction of a parent or is it just me? But if a person just goes through an "average" life, what is it they are passing down? Excuse the rambling, it's hard for me to put this into words!

First Jimmy, you should not worry about what others think of you. It is nothing but their opinion. When you look in the mirror do you see an average person or do you see a man who thinks the world of his family and wants to give them the best in life? Then you need to ask what you base "the best" on. Is it your values or what society says you need to do? My kids know the difference between "need" and "want". They don't wear Gucci, American Eagle, or Holister unless it comes from the clearance rack. They do know how to make a meal, go grocery shopping, clip coupons, do laundry, clean a house, and appreciate what they have. I will not have to worry about any of them. Three are already on their own. The other three are in the kitchen on their computer stations interacting with each other. If you can produce a kid that is not dependent upon society, can earn a living, and teach the same to his kids, then you are a success.

I know this because my parents, both first generation Americans, taught me the same.

gabosaurus
05-23-2010, 10:28 PM
Best thing you can offer your offspring is being a good role model.
Look at some of the kids with huge inheritances or financial stakes who do zero with their lives. Kids are better off earning their keep.
Solid advice and parental discipline are the most valuable thing you can offer your children. Too many parents try to be friends with their kids. It never works.
Neither should you be Nanny Dad or Disney Dad. This is particularly true with divorced parents who each try to curry favor with their offspring.
Kids need to learn personal responsibility. Stop running up to the school to argue that nothing is your kid's fault. Similarly, don't coach athletic teams for the purpose of making sure your kid is the star player. Kids need to learn to fail They need to learn how to be wrong.

Take kid. Apply hugs and discipline, yelling and applauding. Mix vigorously. Apply to kid as needed.
Value: priceless.