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View Full Version : Always Hit on the Wingman’: Love tips from the male mind



Shadow
01-25-2012, 01:24 AM
Men is this a true? Becasue I would think that some men are kind of like some women, in that they won't move in on people their friends seem interested in.


Snippet from article:

There’s a truism that your best interview is always for the job you don’t want. Flirting is the same way. Have you ever noticed how effortlessly cute you are when you’re talking to someone you’re not attracted to? How you’re always getting the wrong guy to eat out of your hand? The best part of the Wingman Technique is that you get to be effortlessly cute and confident and relaxed in front of the guy you actually like. Hitting on the wingman is like interviewing for the job that you don’t want, with a recruiter for your dream job standing right there, very impressed.
Big caveat: There’s a difference between flirting and coming on like a starved velociraptor. I bet you can guess which side of the fence to stay on. Go easy on it. Be subtle. If you go overboard, you’ll seem desperate—or possibly nuts.
2) Men crave what they don’t have.
Here’s the second reason the Wingman Technique works. I call it the Cheeseburger Principle: When a guy sees his friend eating a cheeseburger, he instantly becomes hungry for a cheeseburger. Even if he just ate. Even if he’s trying really hard to be a vegetarian. Watching a woman flirt with his friend has the same effect.

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/46101988/ns/today-books/

ConHog
01-25-2012, 09:02 AM
Men is this a true? Becasue I would think that some men are kind of like some women, in that they won't move in on people their friends seem interested in.


Snippet from article:

There’s a truism that your best interview is always for the job you don’t want. Flirting is the same way. Have you ever noticed how effortlessly cute you are when you’re talking to someone you’re not attracted to? How you’re always getting the wrong guy to eat out of your hand? The best part of the Wingman Technique is that you get to be effortlessly cute and confident and relaxed in front of the guy you actually like. Hitting on the wingman is like interviewing for the job that you don’t want, with a recruiter for your dream job standing right there, very impressed.
Big caveat: There’s a difference between flirting and coming on like a starved velociraptor. I bet you can guess which side of the fence to stay on. Go easy on it. Be subtle. If you go overboard, you’ll seem desperate—or possibly nuts.
2) Men crave what they don’t have.
Here’s the second reason the Wingman Technique works. I call it the Cheeseburger Principle: When a guy sees his friend eating a cheeseburger, he instantly becomes hungry for a cheeseburger. Even if he just ate. Even if he’s trying really hard to be a vegetarian. Watching a woman flirt with his friend has the same effect.

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/46101988/ns/today-books/


both are true.

Especially 2. It's because of our competitive nature, if you're fliriting with our friend, doesn't matter if we want you or not, our immediate thought is "why the fuck isn't she flirting with me?" :laugh:'

Shadow
01-25-2012, 09:21 AM
both are true.

Especially 2. It's because of our competitive nature, if you're fliriting with our friend, doesn't matter if we want you or not, our immediate thought is "why the fuck isn't she flirting with me?" :laugh:'

So...then what happens when you end up actually getting the someone you really don't want?

Oh... and what about #3 ? "If men think something—or someone—is too easily attained, we worry we may be too good for it".

ConHog
01-25-2012, 09:25 AM
So...then what happens when you end up actually getting the someone you really don't want?

Oh... and what about #3 ? "If men think something—or someone—is too easily attained, we worry we may be too good for it".

I don't know what happens, b/c I never played that game. Doesn't mean it didn't happen and I didn't wonder why my friend was being flirted with, just means I didn't try to compete..... Just never was my thing.

Same with #3.

Guess it boils down to I never have been a player so ........

CSM
01-25-2012, 09:45 AM
I guess I have never been a player either. Never had a woman actually flirt with me that I know of, so am I to presume those women flirting with my friends were really after me???? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Shadow
01-25-2012, 09:56 AM
I guess I have never been a player either. Never had a woman actually flirt with me that I know of, so am I to presume those women flirting with my friends were really after me???? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I think you are asking the wrong woman. Going by this article...I would place myself into the..."oops... I ended up with the one I didn't really want." catagory.

And they say men arent complex :laugh:

cadet
01-25-2012, 10:17 AM
Men is this a true? Becasue I would think that some men are kind of like some women, in that they won't move in on people their friends seem interested in.


Snippet from article:

There’s a truism that your best interview is always for the job you don’t want. Flirting is the same way. Have you ever noticed how effortlessly cute you are when you’re talking to someone you’re not attracted to? How you’re always getting the wrong guy to eat out of your hand? The best part of the Wingman Technique is that you get to be effortlessly cute and confident and relaxed in front of the guy you actually like. Hitting on the wingman is like interviewing for the job that you don’t want, with a recruiter for your dream job standing right there, very impressed.
Big caveat: There’s a difference between flirting and coming on like a starved velociraptor. I bet you can guess which side of the fence to stay on. Go easy on it. Be subtle. If you go overboard, you’ll seem desperate—or possibly nuts.
2) Men crave what they don’t have.
Here’s the second reason the Wingman Technique works. I call it the Cheeseburger Principle: When a guy sees his friend eating a cheeseburger, he instantly becomes hungry for a cheeseburger. Even if he just ate. Even if he’s trying really hard to be a vegetarian. Watching a woman flirt with his friend has the same effect.

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/46101988/ns/today-books/

I Bolded the parts i agree with, I hate that i can't talk to women I'm interested in... but the ugo's, yeah, no problem. And then they start liking me... :bang3:
And then there's the girls my friends like, off the menu. automatically. gotta respect the guys. Girls come and go, but your buds will always be there.
BRO'S BEFORE HOES! :beer:

Thunderknuckles
01-25-2012, 11:52 AM
1 and 2 are true enough but as others have said, you don't go after the girl your buddy is interested in. It think that's a big no no for both sexes.

#3 Isn't necessarily male centric. It applies more to human nature in general. We all appreciate something more that we have struggled to obtain. I don't know how well this applies to relationships. I have seen people make an instant connection with each other. No real effort involved. Maybe that's just luck. On the other hand, you don't really think about marrying a girl who you just said "hi" to and an hour later you're in the sack with her. Although, I did marry a girl like that but it took me a litte more than an hour to get her home with me :p
17 years later we're still going strong.

Moral of the story?
Don't listen to TK, he has no clue what the hell he is talking about.

ConHog
01-25-2012, 12:42 PM
1 and 2 are true enough but as others have said, you don't go after the girl your buddy is interested in. It think that's a big no no for both sexes.

#3 Isn't necessarily male centric. It applies more to human nature in general. We all appreciate something more that we have struggled to obtain. I don't know how well this applies to relationships. I have seen people make an instant connection with each other. No real effort involved. Maybe that's just luck. On the other hand, you don't really think about marrying a girl who you just said "hi" to and an hour later you're in the sack with her. Although, I did marry a girl like that but it took me a litte more than an hour to get her home with me :p
17 years later we're still going strong.

Moral of the story?
Don't listen to TK, he has no clue what the hell he is talking about.

8 years ago I would have told you that instant connection thing was bullshit. But then I met "her" , there was no doubt from the moment I saw her, and even if she's just being kind now, she says she felt the same way. We dated 6 months before getting married and only waited that long b/c she wanted a specific wedding and we had to set it up in advance.

I don't intend on ever letting her get away.

Shadow
01-25-2012, 10:19 PM
I Bolded the parts i agree with, I hate that i can't talk to women I'm interested in... but the ugo's, yeah, no problem. And then they start liking me... :bang3:
And then there's the girls my friends like, off the menu. automatically. gotta respect the guys. Girls come and go, but your buds will always be there.
BRO'S BEFORE HOES! :beer:

Bro's before Ho's LOL I like that one.

Anyway...it's the same for women...the sexual attraction does weird things to your mind. Can't think of what you want to say...and the moment passes. Either that or you say stupid crap that you want to kick yourself for later.

Edited to add: Here is another weird one...what is with guys that when they are not interested in you...instead of just saying so...they put some of their friends up to having mercy sex with you (that's what I call it anyway). What makes you men think that women you turn down want to fuck your friends? I don't get this.

ConHog
01-25-2012, 10:27 PM
Bro's before Ho's LOL I like that one.

Anyway...it's the same for women...the sexual attraction does weird things to your mind. Can't think of what you want to say...and the moment passes. Either that or you say stupid crap that you want to kick yourself for later.

Edited to add: Here is another weird one...what is with guys that when they are not interested in you...instead of just saying so...they put some of their friends up to having mercy sex with you (that's what I call it anyway). What makes you men think that women you turn down want to fuck your friends? I don't get this.

That's more helping out our friends, giving them our leftovers LOL. Not that I've ever done that...........

Shadow
01-25-2012, 10:35 PM
That's more helping out our friends, giving them our leftovers LOL. Not that I've ever done that...........

I take it that there are women stupid enough to lap up some assholes scraps then? I normally just chalk it up to... "well...thank god I dodged that bullet".

ConHog
01-25-2012, 10:42 PM
I take it that there are women stupid enough to lap up some assholes scraps then? I normally just chalk it up to... "well...thank god I dodged that bullet".

yes, well those kind of guys LOOK for girls who have no self esteem.

Shadow
01-25-2012, 11:04 PM
1 and 2 are true enough but as others have said, you don't go after the girl your buddy is interested in. It think that's a big no no for both sexes.

#3 Isn't necessarily male centric. It applies more to human nature in general. We all appreciate something more that we have struggled to obtain. I don't know how well this applies to relationships. I have seen people make an instant connection with each other. No real effort involved. Maybe that's just luck. On the other hand, you don't really think about marrying a girl who you just said "hi" to and an hour later you're in the sack with her. Although, I did marry a girl like that but it took me a litte more than an hour to get her home with me :p
17 years later we're still going strong.

Moral of the story?
Don't listen to TK, he has no clue what the hell he is talking about.

Yes...but how many duds do us humans go through before we learn what we really want in a SO? I think after you have been in enough relationships the wisdom starts to kick in and you are more prone to be attracted to a certain "type" ... and I don't mean physically. You get to where you can spot the bad seeds pretty quick. I don't waste my time dealing with those...friendships or otherwise.

Thunderknuckles
01-26-2012, 01:05 AM
Yes...but how many duds do us humans go through before we learn what we really want in a SO? I think after you have been in enough relationships the wisdom starts to kick in and you are more prone to be attracted to a certain "type" ... and I don't mean physically. You get to where you can spot the bad seeds pretty quick. I don't waste my time dealing with those...friendships or otherwise.
No doubt experience counts for a lot. However, too much experience and you have to question is it you or the people you choose to date?

On a side note: Why do you use "SO"? I assume this means "Significant Other". I have despised that term from the first day I heard it because it lacks any and all passion when referring to someone you love. It's like referring to a friend as an "Intellectual Stimulant".

Abbey Marie
01-26-2012, 09:26 AM
No doubt experience counts for a lot. However, too much experience and you have to question is it you or the people you choose to date?

On a side note: Why do you use "SO"? I assume this means "Significant Other". I have despised that term from the first day I heard it because it lacks any and all passion when referring to someone you love. It's like referring to a friend as an "Intellectual Stimulant".

My pet peeve is the use of the "DH", "DD", etc., shorthand expressions. Uggh.

cadet
01-26-2012, 10:10 AM
...Flirting is the same way. Have you ever noticed how effortlessly cute you are when you’re talking to someone you’re not attracted to?...

Just a note from here, last night, attempted to ask out this girl, tripped over my own tongue,
Damn you brain! why must you go blank?
:bang3:

Shadow
01-26-2012, 10:36 AM
No doubt experience counts for a lot. However, too much experience and you have to question is it you or the people you choose to date?

On a side note: Why do you use "SO"? I assume this means "Significant Other". I have despised that term from the first day I heard it because it lacks any and all passion when referring to someone you love. It's like referring to a friend as an "Intellectual Stimulant".

I agree with the too much experience comment. Repeating the same mistakes over and over...could be a sign of low self esteem and/or someone who just needs to be in a relationship because they can't be alone.

Don't know why I used SO. Probably because I was talking in general terms I guess.

Shadow
01-26-2012, 10:47 AM
Just a note from here, last night, attempted to ask out this girl, tripped over my own tongue,
Damn you brain! why must you go blank?
:bang3:

I think people put too much pressure on themselves trying to be charming,witty or whatever...and always trying to come up with the perfect thing to say. Best just to keep it casual,put your brain at ease and let the conversation flow. Then maybe lead the conversation to places or interests you have in common or places you've never tried but want to. Instead of building up to the big date question....make it more subtle.

The fear of rejection hold us back a lot.

cadet
01-26-2012, 08:27 PM
well, screwed up so bad, she felt bad for me. and is going to give me a chance.

pity date? nay.

Abbey Marie
01-26-2012, 08:34 PM
well, screwed up so bad, she felt bad for me. and is going to give me a chance.

pity date? nay.

Whoa, now, don't assume it's out of pity. Some of us females prefer a guy who isn't all smooth. :cool:

ConHog
01-26-2012, 09:10 PM
well, screwed up so bad, she felt bad for me. and is going to give me a chance.

pity date? nay.


Whoa, now, don't assume it's out of pity. Some of us females prefer a guy who isn't all smooth. :cool:

My pickup line to my wife was " Hi , I'm_________ I think you're just gorgeous and I'd like to get to know you." Some women really like the game, but some women just want a guy to be upfront with them right from the start.