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View Full Version : Attempted murder on the High Street!



Noir
10-17-2012, 01:13 PM
So there I was, dandering down to work, listening to some calypso scat jazz, and really feeling the rhythm, when out of nowhere I felt a hand on my arm.

Being a sane human, I instantly regarded this as an attack, and i regard any attack on my person, my children or any person to be with the intent to kill. Without a moments hesitation I turned their life into a word of pain, and once the psycho was disabled, I carried on my way. Though obviously slightly more vigilant than before, invade this lunatic was just one part of a pack.

I have since learnt that the attempted murderer was non-other than an Auntie of mine, whom I had always considered quite trustworthy. But as it turns out she clearly has deep rooted psychopathic tendencies, which she is now trying to cover up by telling the totalitarian authorises that she was merely trying to get my attention. Pft.

Naturally the state have brought up some trumped up charges against me (imagine being charged because you were STOPPING yourself getting MURDERED). This is obviously part of the totalitarians plans to make us all hesitate when we are under attack. So we can all be killed.

This morning I though this was a free country, tonight I shall weep before I sleep at the realisation that its actually a liberal totalitarian communist one.

fj1200
10-17-2012, 01:51 PM
You should be applauded, not denigrated. I will start a facebook page, if I were on facebook, to garner support for your plight. Be sure not to be expecting any unbiased reporting from any of the totalitarian backed far left leaning progressive newspapers for honest coverage of your side of the story. May God, if you believed in Him anyway, have mercy on your soul.

Arm up brother.

Nukeman
10-17-2012, 03:02 PM
So there I was, dandering down to work, listening to some calypso scat jazz, and really feeling the rhythm, when out of nowhere I felt a hand on my arm.

Being a sane human, I instantly regarded this as an attack, and i regard any attack on my person, my children or any person to be with the intent to kill. Without a moments hesitation I turned their life into a word of pain, and once the psycho was disabled, I carried on my way. Though obviously slightly more vigilant than before, invade this lunatic was just one part of a pack.

I have since learnt that the attempted murderer was non-other than an Auntie of mine, whom I had always considered quite trustworthy. But as it turns out she clearly has deep rooted psychopathic tendencies, which she is now trying to cover up by telling the totalitarian authorises that she was merely trying to get my attention. Pft.

Naturally the state have brought up some trumped up charges against me (imagine being charged because you were STOPPING yourself getting MURDERED). This is obviously part of the totalitarians plans to make us all hesitate when we are under attack. So we can all be killed.

This morning I though this was a free country, tonight I shall weep before I sleep at the realisation that its actually a liberal totalitarian communist one.
Now I would say if you were in a hospital setting than you would not be charged due to the fact that she was attempting to abduct you and you were well within your rights to use such force....

jimnyc
10-17-2012, 03:05 PM
Sadly, Noir, your humor will definitely be lost!

Trigg
10-17-2012, 03:14 PM
Sadly, Noir, your humor will definitely be lost!


only by those with no functioning brain cells :thumb:


Noir, very funny....you are such a smart ass sometimes, and I mean that in a good way :beer:

Noir
10-18-2012, 11:53 AM
only by those with no functioning brain cells :thumb:
Noir, very funny....you are such a smart ass sometimes, and I mean that in a good way :beer:

You mean i'm not a smart ass all the time??? :slap:

Trigg
10-18-2012, 06:14 PM
You mean i'm not a smart ass all the time??? :slap:

geez give someone a compliment and they smack you in the head, what's up with that.:poke: