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jimnyc
12-14-2012, 11:03 AM
That's because I'm leaving shortly for a few days in NJ. Would like to go to the cemetery and place a grave blanket out for Mom, and also pay my holiday respects to her parents who are buried next to her, and my Uncle. I'll stay a day and a half so I can visit with my Aunt and then some time with my brother and sister who live nearby.

I would get pictures, but there's not much to get in boring 'ol NJ, and my brother and sister are too ugly to share with you guys. :coffee:

Tyr-Ziu Saxnot
12-14-2012, 11:11 AM
That's because I'm leaving shortly for a few days in NJ. Would like to go to the cemetery and place a grave blanket out for Mom, and also pay my holiday respects to her parents who are buried next to her, and my Uncle. I'll stay a day and a half so I can visit with my Aunt and then some time with my brother and sister who live nearby.

I would get pictures, but there's not much to get in boring 'ol NJ, and my brother and sister are too ugly to share with you guys. :coffee:

Its great to remember our family both the living and those passed on , especially this time of year.
Have a great visit there.-Tyr

jimnyc
12-14-2012, 11:16 AM
Its great to remember our family both the living and those passed on , especially this time of year.
Have a great visit there.-Tyr

It is, it is, but I know it's going to make for a tough weekend. I'm still not over losing Mom, and every time I visit, I leave with memories and thoughts racing through my head and a bit out of it, which doesn't make me the best company to be around. Not mean or nasty, just depressed, sad and not in a very "festive" mood. I need to find a way to get past this with Mom.

I will try and have some fun with my brother, sister & retarded brother in law to change. Maybe I'll have fun getting dumb pictures of them to cheer me up.

tailfins
12-14-2012, 12:57 PM
That's because I'm leaving shortly for a few days in NJ. Would like to go to the cemetery and place a grave blanket out for Mom, and also pay my holiday respects to her parents who are buried next to her, and my Uncle. I'll stay a day and a half so I can visit with my Aunt and then some time with my brother and sister who live nearby.

I would get pictures, but there's not much to get in boring 'ol NJ, and my brother and sister are too ugly to share with you guys. :coffee:


What's boring about NJ? I never had a hard time finding interesting things to see and do. Please don't put me in a position of needing to sound like a representative from the Department of Tourism. I'm just telling you my experience.

Abbey Marie
12-14-2012, 01:10 PM
It is, it is, but I know it's going to make for a tough weekend. I'm still not over losing Mom, and every time I visit, I leave with memories and thoughts racing through my head and a bit out of it, which doesn't make me the best company to be around. Not mean or nasty, just depressed, sad and not in a very "festive" mood. I need to find a way to get past this with Mom.

I will try and have some fun with my brother, sister & retarded brother in law to change. Maybe I'll have fun getting dumb pictures of them to cheer me up.

Picture your Mom in heaven, telling the angels how proud she is of her son.

jimnyc
12-15-2012, 09:28 AM
Horrible nights sleep. just realized i cant type o tablet. believe it or not it is easier on smaller phone prob cause i am used to it. disregard mini rant and i will pop on later. lol

jimnyc
12-15-2012, 09:53 AM
On cell now, I guess just more used to this keyboard. Bored at hotel waiting for my retarded sister so we can go to Union, NJ where cemetery is, and also mom and dads hometown. Janeen is late for everything though.

Kathianne
12-15-2012, 09:56 AM
On cell now, I guess just more used to this keyboard. Bored at hotel waiting for my retarded sister so we can go to Union, NJ where cemetery is, and also mom and dads hometown. Janeen is late for everything though.

Coffee, more coffee! ;) Have a good time!

NightTrain
12-15-2012, 10:03 AM
Say hi to Janeen for me. Have a good trip there in NJ!

PostmodernProphet
12-16-2012, 08:47 AM
I've never heard of a "grave blanket" before.....what is it?.....

Nukeman
12-16-2012, 09:12 AM
I've never heard of a "grave blanket" before.....what is it?.....Its usually made out of holly and evergreen branches weaved together to cover the ground of the grave.. mostly at Christmas time.. We put these on my grandparents every year...

4144

PostmodernProphet
12-16-2012, 12:41 PM
interesting.....I have never heard or seen such a thing before.......

jimnyc
12-16-2012, 12:48 PM
Coffee, more coffee! ;) Have a good time!

Starting mid morning yesterday until I just got home, I must have had 90 cups to keep me going! LOL


Say hi to Janeen for me. Have a good trip there in NJ!

I did, and Sir Evil, they were right with me when I saw this message. Janeen asked when you were coming to the mainland.


I've never heard of a "grave blanket" before.....what is it?.....

I've heard of them as grave blankets and grave covers over the years. It's always been a Christmas tradition. We used to go with Mom and place one on the grave for her parents, which is right next to hers, now we just buy an additional, as it's her parents, my uncle and Mom.


Its usually made out of holly and evergreen branches weaved together to cover the ground of the grave.. mostly at Christmas time.. We put these on my grandparents every year...

4144

Yep, looks like the exact one we got!

It was a nice trip. We picked up my Aunt in the morning and made a little event out of it. I barely see her, and she doesn't get around very well, so it was good for her to go to since it's her husband there too. He passed away when he was 42. We all went out for a late breakfast as well and it was nice to be out as a family, even if it was a different group of people than when growing up. I feel bad for my Aunt as she is really the only one left from the family she grew up with.

But then after the family stuff was over, we went back to "brothers and sisters" and acted like our usual idiot selves afterwards, which is also fun! LOL

jimnyc
12-17-2012, 05:39 PM
And now I'm in a funk, which appeared to have started by listening to Christmas music. I was traveling locally when I switched to a station that is only playing Christmas music now. I lot of the more religious songs reminded me of going to church when I was real young. Then the rest of the music just reminded me of my the house we grew up in, Mom cooking, the presents that seemed like thousands under the tree, all the lights and just the overall atmosphere of fun and happiness. Hell, I remember Mom and Dad were still married! Just brought me back to my childhood. Then of course my brain drifted back to current times and in that instant, the things I have lost came rushing back. And now Christmas is like this sad day that must now face once a year. Barely a tree, 1 card in the mail, feeling guilty about not being able to do for others, too much family too far away.

I just read this too, which didn't do much to lift my spirits. Bravo to SNL though. Apparently one of the only times ever they opened the show without a comedic sketch.

http://www.csmonitor.com/The-Culture/Latest-News-Wires/2012/1217/SNL-features-poignant-tribute-to-victims-of-Connecticut-shooting

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/_XGFiE536gg" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Kathianne
12-17-2012, 05:45 PM
Jim, remember when Christmas was 'magic?' Of course you do, you just posted that. So, would you deny your son? Remember when it was 'all good,' before mom and dad split. Go for that.

Ok, I may be way out of line with that, but I'm trying to help. For your son's sake too. It might behoove you and/or wife, to invite family or 'friends without a place to go' to come over to your house for Christmas Eve or Day. Just an idea. I'm betting you are a hell of a host in reality, as you certainly are in virtual.

Merry Christmas!

jimnyc
12-17-2012, 05:57 PM
Jim, remember when Christmas was 'magic?' Of course you do, you just posted that. So, would you deny your son? Remember when it was 'all good,' before mom and dad split. Go for that.

Ok, I may be way out of line with that, but I'm trying to help. For your son's sake too. It might behoove you and/or wife, to invite family or 'friends without a place to go' to come over to your house for Christmas Eve or Day. Just an idea. I'm betting you are a hell of a host in reality, as you certainly are in virtual.

Merry Christmas!

Thanks, Kath

What sucks for my son is that we barely have family around here. We have Diana's aunt fairly close, then my brother and sister in NJ and then it's down to the Carolina's for the rest, and further south. Back when I was a kid the family was a bit larger, and everyone was seemingly close by. Plus, times were different, back then I was out with friends every single day that we weren't busy with the family. Now kids are attached to the digital world and barely go out. We'll probably go to NJ for sometime Christmas Day. He loves going there anyway as that's where Jaelynn, Jared, Trevor and Sara live (his cousins) and that'll make things more festive.

Kathianne
12-17-2012, 06:06 PM
Thanks, Kath

What sucks for my son is that we barely have family around here. We have Diana's aunt fairly close, then my brother and sister in NJ and then it's down to the Carolina's for the rest, and further south. Back when I was a kid the family was a bit larger, and everyone was seemingly close by. Plus, times were different, back then I was out with friends every single day that we weren't busy with the family. Now kids are attached to the digital world and barely go out. We'll probably go to NJ for sometime Christmas Day. He loves going there anyway as that's where Jaelynn, Jared, Trevor and Sara live (his cousins) and that'll make things more festive.

Things change, you wish your dad and Jeff were closer. I get that. However, one needs to make do with what is at hand.

Yep, kids love to connect with their families. Unfortunately adults sometimes forget what that was like, rationalize that their kids prefer virtual to real. It's just not true. Indeed, if you tell your son, "Hey, while we're with the cousins, aunts, uncles, no smart phone or ipad", he'll give a grunt and turn it off. The grunt is in thanks, believe it or not. They want connections, it's us, the parents and grandparents that have been allowing them to go into their own worlds, saving the issues of dealing with immediacy.

No reflection on you or wife, we're all guilty of that.

You don't have to replicate the past, just remember how good it felt to be connected to something. Perhaps without realizing it. We'd all like it to be family, but sometimes we just have to make the family up from others doing the same.

Tyr-Ziu Saxnot
12-17-2012, 06:10 PM
Thanks, Kath

What sucks for my son is that we barely have family around here. We have Diana's aunt fairly close, then my brother and sister in NJ and then it's down to the Carolina's for the rest, and further south. Back when I was a kid the family was a bit larger, and everyone was seemingly close by. Plus, times were different, back then I was out with friends every single day that we weren't busy with the family. Now kids are attached to the digital world and barely go out. We'll probably go to NJ for sometime Christmas Day. He loves going there anyway as that's where Jaelynn, Jared, Trevor and Sara live (his cousins) and that'll make things more festive.

I think that Kathiane gave you jolly good advice. No matter what we put our son first in this Christmas celebration. Always with me ,kids first, adults last. I get more joy out of making one kid happy with a Christmas present than I do making ten adults happy!
Be sure to let him spend time with those cousins.....-Tyr