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View Full Version : Satisfying my little critic's ongoing and insightful demands.



Tyr-Ziu Saxnot
09-26-2015, 11:12 AM
Halloween Night Adventures Of Kansel and Betal

Part One

Was dark and scary Halloween night of O'nine
Kansel and Betal dressed as monsters of fright.
Mom and Dad looking on saw they looked so fine
dressed up as little demons for Halloween night.

Off they raced to collect sweets and have fun
last year's candies and joy they thought about.
Now dark, two long hours past the setting sun
Kids with candy, each letting out a happy shout.

Kansel and Betal took a cut through the woods
Each thinking, Mom and Dad always said don't go.
Happy, thinking of getting the next sweet goods
They ignored great wisdom of parents that know!

As forest's long path got creepy and ever so dark
each felt the others hand grabbed a firm hold.
This forbidden shortcut taken on as a happy lark
each trying to prove to the other they were bold!

Approaching the old and mighty burnt black oak
first they heard a scary and grumbling growl.
Sounding like a dying body just about to croak
both knew could not be the night call of an owl.

Cautiously they walked past that old scary tree
Only to find beastly and bad monster right there.
Bloody fangs, yellow green eyes filled with glee
dark reality suddenly gave them the worst scare!

Kansel, smart and brave lad, was his father's son
he had brought dad's hunting knife in his pail.
Both knowing would be foolish and useless to run
if they ever survived this, what a story to tell!

Betal realizing Kansel could not win this alone
look about for a weapon that she could use best.
There she saw a long, fallen limb hard as a stone
took it, quick as a flash hit the monster's chest.

Kansel stabbed at the monster's evil yellow eyes
Betal was hitting hard with all her scared might.
Each one praying, that only the black monster dies
both go home unharmed to Mom and Dad tonight!

Suddenly the injured monster knocked Betal down
while leaping over to strike her a deadly blow.
Just then rang the old church's tower bell in town
that divine sound was exactly what decided the show.

For that Holy sound struck the monster in mid leap
causing a stumble as its hairy feet hit the ground.
At that moment Kansel saw his chance and struck deep
as the monster's weakest spot he so suddenly found!

Soft spot in the back of its black and hairy neck
exposed when it stumbled and almost backward fell.
Now as blood gushed out, monster was a dying wreck
Kansel and Betal, O' what a story they could tell!

With gurgling moans , monster screamed as it dies
Kansel and Betal you both shall meet me yet again.
I always find the kids that steal Mom's apple pies
do not dare ever think that you can this easily win!

Robert J. Lindley, 09-26-2015

Note-Written to satisfy my little critic's demands.
Target reached, unlucky, evil number 13 stanza's and
time used under 2 hours..
One day, I just may get good at this methinks.. -Tyr