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Tyr-Ziu Saxnot
12-03-2016, 09:50 AM
Care to answer yes or no??


I am selecting 24 of my poems to be considered for publishing in a book in the future, 2017/2018(?) .
I have the first four selected and this one is one of those four.
My wife thinks this one, should not be in the 24 selected.
She gives no explanation as to why.. Perhaps because its a narrative, with no rhyme..
Here is my question.. It is an edited version of a poem I wrote decades ago.
Should it be or not be included? Feel free to answer either one and not even have to tell why..


A Dream That Came True

In my mind's eye I had seen her undress a thousand times
sending hot flashes that exploded with her moaning
Months before ever summoning the courage to speak to her
I practiced the words befitting her splendor!

She had been noticing my adoring glances as she
adjusted her skimpy bikini in the bright sun
Showing just what a man, any man would hope to see
I moved closer anticipating her charming refusal
to my shock she answered a quick yes and our date
that night was on!

I asked her to wear something sexy and she replied
how about I wear no panties?
My stammering answer made her laugh that laugh
the one that sent shivers up my spine in anticipation

It is on! We met at theater and hardly watched the movie
for her hands were busier than mine!
A nice change to feel the heat of a woman so anxious
I almost wept with joy! What a thrill! She had kept her promise
No panties!!!
None under that sexy short skirt that had made the other men
openly lust for her charms! I saw and was amazed that this vision of
sexual beauty was actually with me!
What happened later that night you can imagine,
the earth shook, the sky fell and I heard a ringing bell!

We married two months later and it was pure sex and bliss
Non stop sex night and day.. Ahh, the memories that last a
lifetime!
Nothing that great can last forever. We burned like the Sun for
a few years and then it happened..
The crash!
My motorcycle hit a tree ,I was rushed to the hospital and woke up
three days later to discover it had been only a very vivid daydream!
My heart broke , I was sorry to have came back to the world! Then,
O' yes then in walks a vision so lovely my heart almost stopped

A new nurse. So hot the paint on the walls started melting.
Over she floats to my bedside. I sat wide eyed looking like a fool!
Awestruck with anticipation! She took my hand, took my pulse .

I fumbled for words, I fought for control. I begged for help to impress
her!
Finally, finally I felt power return and I asked her to just pinch me!
Pinch me! Let me know I am not dreaming again..
She laughed and pinched my left cheek. The lower one! I felt the earth
begin to rise. She noticed and laughed,
LAUGHED THAT LAUGH!!! That laugh!
That laugh came from those sweet lips. I begged for help and she smiled,
O' that smile!
As she turned to leave I asked her to see me again and she said yes!
I shall return in two hours to give you your bath.. Then winked at me!
Longest two hours of my life!
Then I woke up still laying beside my crashed motorcycle!
With a broken leg and shattered dream!!!
Fate can be so cruel.....
So damn cruel...... Then the door opened and I hear her say with a
smile. Time for your bath darling !!! Its late and I'll block this door!
Then she removed her clothes. Crap, dreaming again I thought...
And that is how I met my first wife. Yes she was a dream!!
Something that great never lasts, never lasts....

Robert Lindley, 11-10-2014

Dedicated to my first wife.... and some of it is even true!!!
Found this last week while rummaging around in some old files I had...

Copyright © Robert Lindley | Year Posted 2014

Balu
12-03-2016, 04:12 PM
I would rather share the opinion of your wife.
I think that poetry is different by its nature. Some is for wide audience and some is too intimate and private to be published. That's why some poems are for diaries and personal letters.
Hope that I could explain what i meant.

Abbey Marie
12-03-2016, 07:55 PM
I would rather share the opinion of your wife.
I think that poetry is different by its nature. Some is for wide audience and some is too intimate and private to be published. That's why some poems are for diaries and personal letters.
Hope that I could explain what i meant.

I agree with Balu, Tyr. But I'm a pretty private person.

Tyr-Ziu Saxnot
12-04-2016, 04:02 PM
Thank you Balu and Abbey... I see both your comments make clear and undeniable points.
I have decided to not include that poem, although it is one of my own personal favorites..
Thanks for caring enough to express an opinion and for the high level of sensibilities within those intelligently expressed replies..-Tyr

Balu
12-04-2016, 08:59 PM
Thank you Balu and Abbey... I see both your comments make clear and undeniable points.
I have decided to not include that poem, although it is one of my own personal favorites..
Thanks for caring enough to express an opinion and for the high level of sensibilities within those intelligently expressed replies..-Tyr

Dear Robert,
This poem is wonderful. It charms by the depth of feelings slightly covered by words. It is written in very rare manner of free verse and a person to whom it is dedicated must really be happy and proud that she could raise such feelings.
But life is life and not all the sides of it are to be for the eyes of strangers.
Thank you again, Robert, for your poetry. http://www.kolobok.us/smiles/standart/friends.gif