Kudos to my grandma for emailing this to me!

A guy walks into the local welfare office, arches straight up to the counter
and says, "Hi.....you know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have
a job".

The social worker behind the counter says, "Your timing is excellent. We just
got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and
bodyguard for his beautiful nymphomaniac daughter. You'll have to drive around
in his Mercedes, but he'll supply all of your clothes. Because of the long
hours, meals will be provided. You'll be expected to escort her on her overseas
holiday trips. You will have to satisfy her sexual urges. You'll be provided a
two-bedroom apartment above the garage. The starting salary is $200,000 a year."

The guy, wide-eyed, says, "You're bullshittin' me!"

The social worker says, "Yeah, well........you started it."