*Might* be moving...

[jimnyc]

Mom was discharged from the hospital this past week and was transferred to an extended care rehab unit - pre-approved for 2 weeks minimum by Medicare. We don't know the future of the stay and how much Medicare will cover after that, if any at all.

As a family, we've been working together to try and figure out where Mom will reside permanently once fully released. She is dead set against a plain "nursing home" but it's obvious that she'll need more or less around the clock care once released. She would prefer a place that is less "hospital like" and more like her own place, but with staff on hand for emergencies and assistance. Affordability comes into play and what Medicare will do to assist long term. Social workers are in need of endless documents to try and get her into facilities that fit her criteria. They want 3 years of bank statements, 3 years of tax returns, pay stubs, copy of her divorce decree... basically anything and everything that would be financially related. She does not have most of this stuff, and again as a family we are working to gather what is needed.

I went yesterday and spent quite a bit of time cleaning her apartment and tossing out anything and everything that would even resemble "garbage". All sentimental things set aside in one box, clothes in another and documents in yet another. Still, TONS of cleaning remains. I'm talking about scrubbing walls, sinks, toilet, shower/tub, refrigerator, computer desk area... I want everything to be smoke free, dust free & mold free. We also want to have her carpet replaced.

Should we not have a place for her to go when released, I am going to have her go back "home" and I will move in with her until we can find suitable care for her. I will likely be going this Wednesday to stay for multiple days to continue cleaning and doing whatever I have to do to gather all of her documentation - which may require phone calls, forms mailed out with checks, visits to court houses, Trenton NJ for tax info & maybe even my Dad's lawyer from well over 20 years ago for a copy of their divorce decree.

I only will move in with her because she's my Mom and I love her to death, but it will be very trying times. Caring for someone who has difficulty even sitting up in bed, let alone getting to the bathroom or shower is going to be quite difficult. But my hope is that family will band together to make her transition to an appropriate home for her painless, and quick.

I think I'm more nervous than the woman who just had triple bypass surgery!

[red states rule]

Jim, as always, your mom is in my prayers. I wish her, you, and the rest of the family only the best

[Kathianne]

What RSR said. If you need moral support, you know we're all here for Joan and you.

[red states rule]

What RSR said. If you need moral support, you know we're all here for Joan and you.

Ditto Jim - anything I can do

[Abbey Marie]

You are a wonderful son, Jim. Not everyone would disrupt their lives to this extent. Joan will be so touched, and proud of how she raised you.

[LiberalNation]

Not everyone would disrupt their lives to this extent.

Most can't, they have jobs and other responsiblities that prevents them from providing for someone who needs around the clock care.

Good for you Jim. Avoid standard nursing homes as long as possible but realize there may be no other options in the long term unless you have a huge bank account or she does.