Why men don't want to commit to steady relationships
The answer to this question is fairly simple, but it will probably surprise the hell out of you.
Most men don't want commitment because they can't afford it financially.
It's a simple fact of life, but nothing prevents the accumulation of money like a woman. Money spent on a woman is never an investment; it's an expense. A man who expects a financial return on that money is a fool.
Consider two hypothetical guys, Bob and Mark. They are roommates, both have just graduated from the same high school, and both have decided to wait a year before deciding whether to go to college. They both have jobs in the same electronics store, where they each make the same salary and each have $350 per month left over after paying all their bills.
There's where the similarity ends. Bob gets a girlfriend; Mark does not. Over the next year, Bob spends 20 hours a week and $350 a month on his girlfriend. Mark decides to take 20 hours a week and $350 a month and put it into a part-time business.
After that year, Bob's girlfriend dumps him, because she thinks he's a loser in a dead-end job with no ambition. Meanwhile Mark has been able to grow his business to a point where he can quit his electronics store job and make $90,000 per year working only 30 hours a week (because Mark's employees do most of the work). Who do you think Bob's girlfriend is seeing now? Yup, it's Mark.
Unfortunately, it doesn't end there. After their first trip to Europe, Mark becomes a Bob. He focuses most of his attention on his girlfriend, taking her on extravagant trips around the world. After a year, she leaves him for a guy she met in Aspen (a trip Mark paid for), telling Mark that somewhere he lost that entrepreneurial passion that attracted her to him in the first place. Naturally, Mark gets very depressed and loses what little interest he had left in his business. His money is spent, his passion is gone, and without the passion, he will never make the money back. He sees himself as just another failed entrepreneur getting a 2-year late start into college. This is a very common story of the "loser who could have been a multimillionaire."
How is a man to deal with this? The key is to find a female friend (not a girlfriend) who
1. Doesn't need money from you to pay for a lifestyle she wants but can't afford on her own,
2. Doesn't need to be somebody's wife or girlfriend to feel like she has stability and self-worth, and
3. Doesn't use you like an emotional dumpster every time she expects you to fix a problem.
Women like these are not common, but they're well worth holding out for.
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Originally Posted by Little-Acorn
. When I was married I enjoyed it but I guess I was a real fool, I mean I was all involved with our babies and taking care of my husbands grandma she lived with us. In retrospect I neglected my husband and he strayed and had alot of affairs so I take responsibility for that but we could have gone to marriage counseling he didnt want to so that was his choice. Raising the kids alone has not been easy, and I don't think any single custodial parent whether its a man or a woman would say it was a free ride.
