Half of men would dump woman who got fat

[Trigg]

My GF is always worried she is gaining weight and comments how her pants are getting tight

I smile and remind her I LOVE her in tight pants

I would never leave her no matter if she gained weight. As I said she is gorgeous inside and out

It's great that you don't care about physical appearance.


I'm sure most men wouldn't think twice about a few pounds here and there, especially after a few years and a couple of kids. However, if we're talking 50 pounds or so than that is going to be a problem for a lot of men. Sure, they wouldn't leave their wife, but I'm sure the man would be voicing his displeasure.

[red states rule]

It's great that you don't care about physical appearance.


I'm sure most men wouldn't think twice about a few pounds here and there, especially after a few years and a couple of kids. However, if we're talking 50 pounds or so than that is going to be a problem for a lot of men. Sure, they wouldn't leave their wife, but I'm sure the man would be voicing his displeasure.

Trigg, when we first met we both had gotten divorced and vowed NEVER to marry again. He both had issues - she was worried about her appearance and I was starting to show signs of cancer (but did not know I had it)

Now, we are both comfortable in our skin, and have bonded to a point where that "M" word is being tossed around. She could gain weight and it would not change who she is,

I remind her sometimes when she talks about gaining weight I love the womens movement

Especially when I am behind them. Then I tell her to put on a pair of her tight jeans

[Trigg]

Trigg, when we first met we both had gotten divorced and vowed NEVER to marry again. He both had issues - she was worried about her appearance and I was starting to show signs of cancer (but did not know I had it)

Now, we are both comfortable in our skin, and have bonded to a point where that "M" word is being tossed around. She could gain weight and it would not change who she is,

I remind her sometimes when she talks about gaining weight I love the womens movement

Especially when I am behind them. Then I tell her to put on a pair of her tight jeans

That's great.

I'm glad you've found the person for you.

[red states rule]

That's great.

I'm glad you've found the person for you.

Trigg, I found my Pot of Gold at the end of the rainbow

I am a very lucky man

Thanks!!

[chloe]

Trigg, when we first met we both had gotten divorced and vowed NEVER to marry again. He both had issues - she was worried about her appearance and I was starting to show signs of cancer (but did not know I had it)

Now, we are both comfortable in our skin, and have bonded to a point where that "M" word is being tossed around. She could gain weight and it would not change who she is,

I remind her sometimes when she talks about gaining weight I love the womens movement

Especially when I am behind them. Then I tell her to put on a pair of her tight jeans

Congrats on that and I want an invitation to the Wedding, I like you and wedding cake alot

[red states rule]

Congrats on that and I want an invitation to the Wedding, I like you and wedding cake alot

The wedding (if it ever happens) is a ways off. First we have to live in the same town

You and all the women here are invited as long as you all wear tight pants

[chloe]

It's great that you don't care about physical appearance.


I'm sure most men wouldn't think twice about a few pounds here and there, especially after a few years and a couple of kids. However, if we're talking 50 pounds or so than that is going to be a problem for a lot of men. Sure, they wouldn't leave their wife, but I'm sure the man would be voicing his displeasure.

I've seen your pic, you definately have a Fantastic Body !!! My sister had 4 kids too and she has a smoking hot body too but she works out 3 hours a day DANG!

I suspect you are naturally thin and never have really had any weight problem, but even if you ever did have one I don't think your husband would ever leave you over it, as his posts seem pretty clear to me he is very in love with you.

Anyway I don't think it is wrong if people leave each other over weight gain or weight loss my sister cheated on her husband 3 times because he doesn't workout he drinks beer and has a beer belly and she doesnt find him attractive.

I just think that not ALL men base everything on looks or body weight, some do but not all.

Personally I wouldn't base any long term commitment to someone based on there looks, because a chemistry happens for me when I click with who they are inside rather then outside and that is what gets me attracted to them in the first place.

[Shadow]

I've had a few drinks and this is a topic that I am VERY passionate about so forgive me if I sound crass. With that said...
The entire poll is bullshit. They are asking the wrong questions and don't have a damn clue.

Here it is real simple:
1. A man doesn't care about his woman gaining weight as long it is reasonable. Child birth will add pounds, no problem. Age will add pounds, no problem. Being lazy and becoming obese, we have a problem
2. Fuck your man, know what he likes, and fuck him well. VERY well.
3. Cook for your man and make him a meal that he will salivate over.

Take everything I said as it applies to a woman, child birth notwithstanding, and apply it to yourself as a man, especially number 2.

Do this, and nobody will be getting "ditched" on either side of the equation, unless they're an idiot.

Okay...I agree that all of those listed items are great,but they seem a little on the shallow side to me. I would hope men were a little deeper than that (no offense) but sometimes I do wonder. When you ask a man what they like in a woman...they usually state things like... shared interests,shared values,looks are secondary blah blah blah...but when actually given a choice...they will pick the shallow,skanky woman as long as she has a good body more times then not. I've seen it happen over and over.

Now...I genuinely find people interesting and like to find out what makes them tick,but I have to say that it is very rare (not that it has never happened) that I find a man that is interested in what I think or what I like etc. Especially when the relationship is no longer in the new stage.

I will say this though...I think a good relationship starts out with a strong friendship.

[darin]

Okay...I agree that all of those listed items are great,but they seem a little on the shallow side to me. I would hope men were a little deeper than that (no offense) but sometimes I do wonder. When you ask a man what they like in a woman...they usually state things like... shared interests,shared values,looks are secondary blah blah blah...but when actually given a choice...they will pick the shallow,skanky woman as long as she has a good body more times then not. I've seen it happen over and over.

Now...I genuinely find people interesting and like to find out what makes them tick,but I have to say that it is very rare (not that it has never happened) that I find a man that is interested in what I think or what I like etc. Especially when the relationship is no longer in the new stage.

I will say this though...I think a good relationship starts out with a strong friendship.

Men want a female who will mate with them. That trumps all - especially if the woman who mates with them conducts herself in a way to stroke the ego (and other parts?) of the man in a way that conveys acceptance of his s3xual prowess.

My ex was, physically, my ideal. However, we didn't synch on very important issues. My wife is nearly the opposite of my ideas (she's too tall, introvert, etc), but when the zombies attack, I want her on my team for a lot of the reasons you listed above.

I'm scared of 'friendship' when thinking of a potential mate. I sorta think a good relationship starts out with a strong sexual/emotional connection. It's easier to teach friendship than passion.

[Shadow]

Men want a female who will mate with them. That trumps all - especially if the woman who mates with them conducts herself in a way to stroke the ego (and other parts?) of the man in a way that conveys acceptance of his s3xual prowess.

My ex was, physically, my ideal. However, we didn't synch on very important issues. My wife is nearly the opposite of my ideas (she's too tall, introvert, etc), but when the zombies attack, I want her on my team for a lot of the reasons you listed above.

I'm scared of 'friendship' when thinking of a potential mate. I sorta think a good relationship starts out with a strong sexual/emotional connection. It's easier to teach friendship than passion.

Well...I agree...that was pretty much my point also. The characteristics that make a woman a good partner are usually always secondary to getting a good piece of ass (or just the thought of getting a good piece of ass) for a lot of men. However, the woman who has learned the art of stroking your ego,has learned that is also the way to get exactly what she wants from you. This is also the kind of woman most men say they don't like...but usually end up with.

I guess if being used is what you are looking for in a mate that would be the way to go for sure though...women for sex...men through sex. I just wonder how many no where relationships people have to go through before they actually decide what they really need is a "partner"?

[darin]

Well...I agree...that was pretty much my point also. The characteristics that make a woman a good partner are usually always secondary to getting a good piece of ass (or just the thought of getting a good piece of ass) for a lot of men. However, the woman who has learned the art of stroking your ego,has learned that is also the way to get exactly what she wants from you. This is also the kind of woman most men say they don't like...but usually end up with.

OR....She loves her man and wants to ensure he feels good about that aspect of their relationship. Helping one's partner feel confident in such a very personal area is part of what makes a great relationship. NEVER manipulating; only encouraging.

I guess if being used is what you are looking for in a mate that would be the way to go for sure though...women for sex...men through sex. I just wonder how many no where relationships people have to go through before they actually decide what they really need is a "partner"?

I knew what I wanted in a mate after my first adult relationship. I married a woman who wasn't that. Turns out though, beyond what I 'knew' I wanted, she is who I may 'need'. Make sense?

[chloe]

Men want a female who will mate with them. That trumps all - especially if the woman who mates with them conducts herself in a way to stroke the ego (and other parts?) of the man in a way that conveys acceptance of his s3xual prowess.

My ex was, physically, my ideal. However, we didn't synch on very important issues. My wife is nearly the opposite of my ideas (she's too tall, introvert, etc), but when the zombies attack, I want her on my team for a lot of the reasons you listed above.

I'm scared of 'friendship' when thinking of a potential mate. I sorta think a good relationship starts out with a strong sexual/emotional connection. It's easier to teach friendship than passion.

Agreed Men need nurturing and passionate expressions about how much they excite there woman, it's a affirming of how happy she makes him when she is able to express it in the bedroom.

I was married and divorced two times. Now my first husband was a horrible drunk and he used to beat me up when in a drunken rage but the rest of the time when he wasnt drunk we got along great. He had a really warped sense of humor and we would make each other laugh for hours. He also was charismatic, eccentric and attractive to me and so I always felt attracted to him physically and that is why when he apologized for hitting me I always forgave him and took him back. It was crazy to take that from him but the attraction made me irrational.

My 2nd ex Husband (the attorney) I met in AA we were all about "getting healthy" staying sober, I had my 2 kids with him. I stayed married to him much longer then my first husband. He went to law school, opened a law office, we stuck out the rough years together. I took care of him, the kids, his grandma. I was on the PTA. I was dutiful, I cooked and cleaned and made a nice home for us all. But there was NO passion between us. In fact it was like a chore, The marriage was depressing and soon he strayed and I was in my own bubble world not realizing he was cheating until much later.

Now that I am divorced and have been alone 11 yrs I have thought alot about it. I miss being married and the sharing family events and good times with a husband, the comfort and coziness of companionship. But if I had to choose a husband again I definately would want to feel attracted to him passionately not just compatible on daily routine stuff. I'd rather be alone if I can't have the passion of attraction in my relationship.

My mom and step dad have been married since the early 70's and they still make out (gross) in the kitchen they still flirt and all that jazz they are honestly really attracted to each other. So when they do squabble it is not the end of the world because soon enough they are laughing and loving again.

Lastly, Attraction from what DMP describes is not only physical looks for men, from what I am understanding it is also how the woman makes the man feel about himself and that is nice. It is the same for woman they like to feel good about themselves too.

[Shadow]

OR....She loves her man and wants to ensure he feels good about that aspect of their relationship. Helping one's partner feel confident in such a very personal area is part of what makes a great relationship. NEVER manipulating; only encouraging.



I knew what I wanted in a mate after my first adult relationship. I married a woman who wasn't that. Turns out though, beyond what I 'knew' I wanted, she is who I may 'need'. Make sense?

Yes...that would be what a "partner" would do. The sexual manipulation is what a lot of men end up with though, because they look for the physical gratification stuff first.

I'm like you...I also knew what I wanted in a relationship after my first time at bat (I learned a lot from that relationship... it lasted 6 years). However,being told that the man I'm interested in has been through all of the women they find "sexually desirable"...but is going to "settle" for me...ain't it. I'd rather be single.

And yes...I do understand what you are saying.

[chloe]

Yes...that would be what a "partner" would do. The sexual manipulation is what a lot of men end up with though, because they look for the physical gratification stuff first.

I'm like you...I also knew what I wanted in a relationship after my first time at bat (I learned a lot from that relationship... it lasted 6 years). However,being told that the man I'm interested in has been through all of the women they find "sexually desirable"...but is going to "settle" for me...ain't it. I'd rather be single.

And yes...I do understand what you are saying.

I'd rather be single too. I want my man to feel like he likes me loves me and is attracted to me as much as I am him. It's gotta be mutual.

[red states rule]

I'd rather be single too. I want my man to feel like he likes me loves me and is attracted to me as much as I am him. It's gotta be mutual.

Hey Chloe, I will tell you as my Mom told me

For every pot there is a lid

and here is a greta song for you

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