Why is the US marriage rate falling sharply?

[Shadow]

For the first time in memory, unmarried Americans will soon outnumber those who are married, according to the latest research. So is this a watershed moment?
At first glance it would appear that, in common with many Western countries, marriage is in terminal decline in the United States.
In 1960, 72% of all American adults were married; in 2010 just 51% were, according to the Pew Centre. The number dropped sharply by 5% in the most recent year, 2009-10.
"I think we are on the cusp of seeing marriage becoming less central to our life course and in framing the lives of our nation's children. So I think it is a major moment in that regard," says Bradford Wilcox, director of the National Marriage Project and a sociology professor at the University of Virginia.

Americans are certainly waiting longer before they tie the knot - the average age for a first marriage is at an all-time high of 26.5 years for women and 28.7 for men - or else opting to cohabit, live alone or not re-marry when they get divorced.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-16274740

[chloe]

I liked being married, but my husband didn't

[Shadow]

I liked being married, but my husband didn't

I waited a long time before getting married...I was 28. I think the average age for women is 24 or 25. I assumed it was the next step after living together,but once the ring was on my finger.. it seemed like the relationship just went to hell. Can't say I enjoyed it...but, I learned a lot from that experience at least. Don't know if I would want to get married again though. Which was one of the comments made in the article,a lot of divorced folks are not doing it a second time.

[Jess]

My immediate opinion would be that there is less marriage in general because women can fend for themselves financially and men have learned that they can do stuff for themselves if they have to. Both have learned that they can have a relationship with somebody and not have to give up half of their stuff if it doesn't work out.

Is that right? Dunno. Right now it fits into my mind-set.

As I told my father - marriage is a crap-shoot any way you look at it. It doesn't matter whether you meet somebody through friends, at a bar, at church, on the internet or anywhere else.

[chloe]

I guess I am just tradtional I like marriage vows and all that romantic commitment stuff

I know you can say it and mean it without getting married but I like the idea of marriage, I never got anything financially from the divorce

my ex husband is a divorce attorney he wrote our divorce contract and I signed it we agreed on everything.

I just think that marriage seems more secure a commitment then living together, as it is much easier to move out then divorce.

But that said I won't marry again.

[Jess]

I guess I am just tradtional I like marriage vows and all that romantic commitment stuff

I know you can say it and mean it without getting married but I like the idea of marriage, I never got anything financially from the divorce

my ex husband is a divorce attorney he wrote our divorce contract and I signed it we agreed on everything.

I just think that marriage seems more secure a commitment then living together, as it is much easier to move out then divorce.

But that said I won't marry again.

If that works for you - then go for it, Chloe. We all gotta do what works for us.

[ConHog]

I had been divorced for almost as long as my current wife had been alive when we met, and I swore I wouldn't get married again, but she wanted a ring and so she got a ring, best decision I ever made was to let her convince me to propose.

btw not really on the time, she was 19 when we met, I'd been divorced for 11 years.

[chloe]

If that works for you - then go for it, Chloe. We all gotta do what works for us.

Sure, everyone is individual in that, and my way isn't the only right way it's just my preference.

[Jess]

Sure, everyone is individual in that, and my way isn't the only right way it's just my preference.

My opinion may change. One never knows.

I had been divorced for almost as long as my current wife had been alive when we met, and I swore I wouldn't get married again, but she wanted a ring and so she got a ring, best decision I ever made was to let her convince me to propose.

btw not really on the time, she was 19 when we met, I'd been divorced for 11 years.

Yeah, you guys go for us younger women.

[ConHog]

Yeah, you guys go for us younger women.

I wasn't looking for any woman, let alone a younger woman. Not my fault she got me in her husband crosshairs and worked some voodoo, I was helpless.

[Shadow]

I guess I am just tradtional I like marriage vows and all that romantic commitment stuff

I know you can say it and mean it without getting married but I like the idea of marriage, I never got anything financially from the divorce

my ex husband is a divorce attorney he wrote our divorce contract and I signed it we agreed on everything.

I just think that marriage seems more secure a commitment then living together, as it is much easier to move out then divorce.

But that said I won't marry again.

Being married has both pros and cons. Financially it was pretty good..that is when the ex was actually working...when he wasn't it was very stressfull wondering how the bills were going to get paid and if the utilities were going to get shut off. It was nice to have someone around to share time with and talk to about everyday issues at first too....when he was actually invested in the relationship. Once it went south though...it was a nightmare.

I have been pretty independant for a very long time,and am now kind of set in my ways ( and have both good and bad habits). Trying to live with someone again, I would have to learn to compromise and be a team player all over again. You never know though could be just like riding a bike

[Jess]

Being married has both pros and cons. Financially it was pretty good (that is when the ex was actually working)...when he wasn't it was very stressfull wondering how the bills were going to get paid and if the utilities were going to get shut off. It was nice to have someone around to share time with and talk to about everyday issues at first too....when he was actually invested in the relationship. Once it went south though...it was a nightmare.

I have been pretty independant for a very long time,and am now kind of set in my ways ( and have both good and bad habits). Trying to live with someone again, I would have to learn to compromise and be a team player all over again. You never know though could be just like riding a bike

I was married for 13 years, then on my own for a year and a half. There are some adjustments to make but having companionship that doesn't try to control everything you do it pretty nice. If you know the person well it helps.

[chloe]

Being married has both pros and cons. Financially it was pretty good (that is when the ex was actually working)...when he wasn't it was very stressfull wondering how the bills were going to get paid and if the utilities were going to get shut off. It was nice to have someone around to share time with and talk to about everyday issues at first too....when he was actually invested in the relationship. Once it went south though...it was a nightmare.

I have been pretty independant for a very long time,and am now kind of set in my ways ( and have both good and bad habits). Trying to live with someone again, I would have to learn to compromise and be a team player all over again. You never know though could be just like riding a bike

I have not been in a relationship offline for many years.

But I have lived with teenage girls (very trying times lol)

I am set in my ways on a lot of things too and that is why I can't imagine a scenario where I would ever marry again, still it is my preferred method of commitment when all is said and done it just seems more romantic to me.

[Shadow]

I have not been in a relationship offline for many years.

But I have lived with teenage girls (very trying times lol)

I am set in my ways on a lot of things too and that is why I can't imagine a scenario where I would ever marry again, still it is my preferred method of commitment when all is said and done it just seems more romantic to me.

I live with two teenage girls too. Great kids...but, I can't wait until the day they decide they need/want to live on their own. I have a feeling I'm going to REALLY need a break by then (if I survive that long).

[logroller]

I guess I am just tradtional I like marriage vows and all that romantic commitment stuff

I know you can say it and mean it without getting married but I like the idea of marriage, I never got anything financially from the divorce

my ex husband is a divorce attorney he wrote our divorce contract and I signed it we agreed on everything.

I just think that marriage seems more secure a commitment then living together, as it is much easier to move out then divorce.

But that said I won't marry again.

I've heard high stress occupations, cops, firefighters, lawyers and doctors, have higher divorce rates and certain medical specialties are higher than others-- I wonder what the divorce rate is for divorce attorneys compared to other legal specialties?

Interestingly, I remember reading somewhere that marriages where the wife makes more money than the husband have higher rates of divorce too.