Well, I went and it was ok. I placed my kids on both sides of me so as to keep them from fighting or messing around too much. Based on how everyone was seated, my mom ended up on the other side of one of my kids. This was nice because it forced her to interact with my youngest, and she did, which kept our conversation limited.

It was nice to see my mom get a decent birthday celebration, I do have to say that. I am not completely heartless and hateful towards her.

I just didn't say much and let everyone else do the talking.

I talked with my grandma an hour beforehand. She said she had set the party up solely because she wanted my mom to have a nice birthday for once. She only included me and my 2 sisters and our respective s/o's, and my mom's boyfriend, who helped get her to the dinner and kept it a secret, etc. It had nothing to do with me and my not speaking to mom, and her wanting to get us to speak. She said it wouldn't be right if she had only asked my sisters to attend but not me. Especially when my shop is literally right across the street.

After dinner we made small talk but really I tried not to say much.

So, all in all, pretty uneventful.