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  1. #1
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    Default The power of forgiveness

    At some time recently, my paternal grandfather passed away. He moved to South Carolina before I was born due to the fact that his two sons had "betrayed him."
    My grandfather was deeply prejudiced and hostile to those he considered "outsiders." When his oldest son married a Mexican immigrant and his youngest son (my dad) married a German immigrant, he cut all ties with them. He refused to attend my sister's wedding because she too married a Mexican immigrant.
    When I got engaged, I found his address and invited him to my wedding (no prob, my husband is American ). To my surprise, he actually came. Left right after though. Old prejudices die hard.

    Where all this comes in is when staff members of the place where he lived went looking for next of kin. The only number they had was mine. My grandfather had saved things from my wedding.
    Which, by law, makes me the sole heir and executor of his estate. According to what his legal rep said. So yes, I get to go to South Carolina and figure out what to do next.
    There is no funeral because his wish was to be cremated.

    My dad and my uncle are coming with me. Because though my grandfather never forgave them in life, they have forgiven him in death.

    RIP my last grandparent. World War II vet. Dedicated conservative. Flawed by still beloved family member.

  2. Thanks Kathianne, revelarts, Elessar thanked this post
  3. #2
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    Quote Originally Posted by gabosaurus View Post
    At some time recently, my paternal grandfather passed away. He moved to South Carolina before I was born due to the fact that his two sons had "betrayed him."
    My grandfather was deeply prejudiced and hostile to those he considered "outsiders." When his oldest son married a Mexican immigrant and his youngest son (my dad) married a German immigrant, he cut all ties with them. He refused to attend my sister's wedding because she too married a Mexican immigrant.
    When I got engaged, I found his address and invited him to my wedding (no prob, my husband is American ). To my surprise, he actually came. Left right after though. Old prejudices die hard.

    Where all this comes in is when staff members of the place where he lived went looking for next of kin. The only number they had was mine. My grandfather had saved things from my wedding.
    Which, by law, makes me the sole heir and executor of his estate. According to what his legal rep said. So yes, I get to go to South Carolina and figure out what to do next.
    There is no funeral because his wish was to be cremated.

    My dad and my uncle are coming with me. Because though my grandfather never forgave them in life, they have forgiven him in death.

    RIP my last grandparent. World War II vet. Dedicated conservative. Flawed by still beloved family member.
    They're going to love YOU in South Carolina. Better be prepared. Sorry for your loss, Gabby.
    “When bad men combine, the good must associate; else they will fall, one by one, an unpitied sacrifice in a contemptible struggle.” Edumnd Burke

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  5. #3
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    Default

    I'm sorry for your loss.

  6. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by gabosaurus View Post
    Where all this comes in is when staff members of the place where he lived went looking for next of kin. The only number they had was mine. My grandfather had saved things from my wedding.
    Which, by law, makes me the sole heir and executor of his estate. According to what his legal rep said. So yes, I get to go to South Carolina and figure out what to do next.
    There is no funeral because his wish was to be cremated.

    My dad and my uncle are coming with me. Because though my grandfather never forgave them in life, they have forgiven him in death.
    Crazy story. But I don't think you've got that right unless he had a will.

    Who Gets What in South Carolina?

    Under intestate succession, who gets what depends on whether or not you have living children, parents, or other close relatives when you die. Here’s a quick overview:
    If you die with: here’s what happens:
    • children but no spouse
    • children inherit everything
    ...

    Children’s Shares in South Carolina

    If you die without a will in South Carolina, your children will receive an “intestate share” of your property. The size of each child’s share depends on how many children you have and whether or not you are married. (See the table above.)
    For children to inherit from you under the laws of intestacy, the state of South Carolina must consider them your children, legally. For many families, this is not a confusing issue. But it’s not always clear. Here are some things to keep in mind.
    ...


    • Grandchildren. Your grandchildren will receive a share only if their parent (your child) has died before you do.
    "when socialism fails, blame capitalism and demand more socialism." - A friend
    "You know the difference between libs and right-wingers? Libs STFU when evidence refutes their false beliefs." - Another friend
    “Don't waste your time with explanations: people only hear what they want to hear.” - Paulo Coelho


  7. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by fj1200 View Post
    Crazy story. But I don't think you've got that right unless he had a will.

    Sounds like most states to me, too.
    After the game, the king and the pawn go into the same box - Author unknown

    “Unfortunately, the truth is now whatever the media say it is”
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  8. #6
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    I misunderstood what the attorney was trying to explain.
    My grandfather had a will that listed several beneficiaries. Because he died at the age of 90, all of them are either dead or unable to be located.
    The final part of the will states that, if no beneficiaries survive him, all assets would go to me. Why, I have no clue whatsoever. We only met once and that was for a brief time. Perhaps I just impressed him as a wonderful person.
    Obviously he never found out that I was a tree-hugging liberal.

    It will take a while for them to figure out his assets. I can't imagine there being much left over since he lived in assisted living for quite a few years.
    My dad suggested that I take any monetary assets and donate to Hillary Clinton. I am pretty certain that would cause me to be struck by lighting.

  9. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by gabosaurus View Post
    RIP my last grandparent. World War II vet. Dedicated conservative. Flawed by still beloved family member.
    We do not see eye-to-eye on things,
    But a heartfelt "Bless You, Little Lady' is sent from me.
    I have lost my mind. If found, please give it a snack and return it?

    "I won't be wronged. I won't be insulted. I won't be laid a hand on. I don't do these things to other people, and I require the same of others"...John Wayne in "The Shootist"

    A Deplorable!

  10. #8
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    One of the main reasons why I posted this was because, unlike me, my paternal grandfather represented most of the ideals embraced by many hard core conservatives.
    My grandfather enlisted in the armed forces after Pearl Harbor, but was tossed out of basic training when they discovered he was only 16. They let him back in a couple of years later and he spent two years in the Pacific. He was training for the invasion of Japan when the war ended.
    My dad said he knew every racial and ethnic curse word known to exist and probably a few more.

    My grandfather was as far to the right as you could imagine. He thought Reagan was too liberal. We won't even go into his thoughts on JFK's assassination.

  11. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by gabosaurus View Post
    One of the main reasons why I posted this was because, unlike me, my paternal grandfather represented most of the ideals embraced by many hard core conservatives.
    My grandfather enlisted in the armed forces after Pearl Harbor, but was tossed out of basic training when they discovered he was only 16. They let him back in a couple of years later and he spent two years in the Pacific. He was training for the invasion of Japan when the war ended.
    My dad said he knew every racial and ethnic curse word known to exist and probably a few more.

    My grandfather was as far to the right as you could imagine. He thought Reagan was too liberal. We won't even go into his thoughts on JFK's assassination.
    What does that have to do with anything? My mother thinks like you. We can't even discuss politics because she's a fruitloop like YOU. I fall asleep watching tv, she shows up and they're hammering Hillary on one of her usual lies and she tries to get in my ass. Don't come in MY house and tell ME what I can watch on MY tv, and don't try to tell me what to think.

    Unless you're the executor of the estate, all you have to do is sit back and wait. And if you ever want to find out who you REALLY are related to, have some family members around. They're arguing over who gets what before the body's cold.
    “When bad men combine, the good must associate; else they will fall, one by one, an unpitied sacrifice in a contemptible struggle.” Edumnd Burke

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