I don't understand gender identity

[Elessar]

Training those who join the military is different from evaluating civilians. With the volunteer military, pretty much everyone who joins is of a similar mindset. Though I do agree the Coast Guard might be different than other branches of the military.

If you are born gay and your family is not of the accepting type (say, hard core religious or conservative), you are facing a life long struggle. Do you accept your compulsion to be gay or lesbian, knowing your family and friends could totally disown you and break contact? Or do you repress your feeling?
Put this in your own feelings. Suppose one of your own kids came out as gay or lesbian. How would you respond?

You're a bit off-track. I had to evaluate civilians when I was teaching swimming and lifesaving. Then I did the same thing
in the CG and even moreso when running or managing a Search and Rescue or Law Enforcement Case.

Your second paragraph? I never gave it a thought. I raised my son to be conservative yet open-minded. He is as
tolerant as I am when it comes to LGBT...just don't force it on him/us. He had to be, going to college at Humbolt State.
Arcata CA is a mecca for LGBT, and some can be pretty pushy or aggressive.

[Trigg]

My opinion on the bathroom/changing room/locker room. If the people walking in LOOK like they belong in their chosen bathroom than I don't see a problem. Heck I've seen transgender people in New Orleans, and it's almost impossible to tell they aren't really woman.

Locker rooms and changing rooms are a different story. When they're changing in a room full of women/men their plumbing better match. I would not want to explain why a "woman" has a penis to a young child.


My problem is the perverts who will decide they're "women" for a day just to get a peek, or a video of a naked woman. Which, coincidentally has already happened at numerous collages.

[gabosaurus]

Trigg, I totally get your point. When my daughter first asked about the bathroom thing and identify, my brother in law told her "there is no question that a kick in the groin won't answer."

You're a bit off-track. I had to evaluate civilians when I was teaching swimming and lifesaving. Then I did the same thing
in the CG and even moreso when running or managing a Search and Rescue or Law Enforcement Case.

My mistake then. That is a different matter already.

Your second paragraph? I never gave it a thought. I raised my son to be conservative yet open-minded. He is as
tolerant as I am when it comes to LGBT...just don't force it on him/us. He had to be, going to college at Humbolt State.
Arcata CA is a mecca for LGBT, and some can be pretty pushy or aggressive.

I have met those who believe that you can't be conservative and open minded. But I know different because my husband is like that. He holds strict conservative values, but he is tolerant of a viewpoint.
My point on being open minded is that you need to be accepting of your own kids and their friends. I have met too many parents who want to mold their kids in their own image. They will follow your teachings at home, but will likely be resentful later in life.

[Gunny]

Don't try to over analyze...or analyze without a face-to-face encounter.

Training Officer Candidates and Recruits I had to understand people; and yes, it has become difficult at times.
Some Recruit stares at me and says "My Mommy told me I do not have to listen to people like You". Well good
luck working on my small boat crew, buoy deck, or underway on a cutter. You'll be scrubbing dishes for 4 years!

I do agree with this restroom / locker room issue with you, though.

I TOTALLY get THAT @Elessar. About 80 recruits per platoon. 40 Marines per company. If you can't read them, somebody gets hurt. You got KNOW who is going on mess duty just to keep them away. The worst were the morale-busters. Constantly whining to anyone that would listen. I can whip a fatass into shape. Hard to change a crybaby.

[Gunny]

Training those who join the military is different from evaluating civilians. With the volunteer military, pretty much everyone who joins is of a similar mindset. Though I do agree the Coast Guard might be different than other branches of the military.

If you are born gay and your family is not of the accepting type (say, hard core religious or conservative), you are facing a life long struggle. Do you accept your compulsion to be gay or lesbian, knowing your family and friends could totally disown you and break contact? Or do you repress your feeling?
Put this in your own feelings. Suppose one of your own kids came out as gay or lesbian. How would you respond?

One, the Coasties are no different than the rest of us.

Two, given what you know of me, how do you think my gay younger daughter feels? She knows I don't approve. Still my daughter. We don't discuss the issue. No one's born gay. That's just BS. Her man-hating mother made her that way. We've been divorced since 93 and she STILL trashes me to my kids. Environment creates gays, not biology. I'm not even sure she is actually my daughter since the ex decided to be Ms Party Girl. But she thinks she is and that's all that matters.

You don't have to dislike the person to disapprove of the behavior.

[Gunny]

You're a bit off-track. I had to evaluate civilians when I was teaching swimming and lifesaving. Then I did the same thing
in the CG and even moreso when running or managing a Search and Rescue or Law Enforcement Case.

Your second paragraph? I never gave it a thought. I raised my son to be conservative yet open-minded. He is as
tolerant as I am when it comes to LGBT...just don't force it on him/us. He had to be, going to college at Humbolt State.
Arcata CA is a mecca for LGBT, and some can be pretty pushy or aggressive.

That sounds like herding cats.

[Kathianne]

Training those who join the military is different from evaluating civilians. With the volunteer military, pretty much everyone who joins is of a similar mindset. Though I do agree the Coast Guard might be different than other branches of the military.

If you are born gay and your family is not of the accepting type (say, hard core religious or conservative), you are facing a life long struggle. Do you accept your compulsion to be gay or lesbian, knowing your family and friends could totally disown you and break contact? Or do you repress your feeling?
Put this in your own feelings. Suppose one of your own kids came out as gay or lesbian. How would you respond?

The killer in Orlando was a registered Democrat, so I guess you are going with 'hard core religious?' There are no 'hard core' religious Democrats? Or Conservatives that would be accepting of their children if gay?

[Elessar]

I TOTALLY get THAT @Elessar. About 80 recruits per platoon. 40 Marines per company. If you can't read them, somebody gets hurt. You got KNOW who is going on mess duty just to keep them away. The worst were the morale-busters. Constantly whining to anyone that would listen. I can whip a fatass into shape. Hard to change a crybaby.

One of the worst things I had to do, as Senior Instructor at the TRACEN Gym, was telling a kid who was really
dedicated that he or she was not physically or mentally qualified to finish Basic Training.

The staff Corpsman and I (as a Physical Education major and Water Safety Instructor) would monitor
and evaluate each and every initial failure. We found one that slipped through MEPS and initial medical
screening that was born without the left pectoralis major muscle! I did not even let him take the initial swim test.
This lad really wanted to serve, but would have been a hazard to himself, let alone he could not pass most of the
initial physical screening. Our Chief sent him back to his CC (Drill Sgt to You) for recommendation for release from the service.

Just one example....kid had great motivation...but facts are facts.

[Elessar]

That sounds like herding cats.

Actually in some ways it was. The easiest age groups to teach initial swimming
are from 3-6 years years old: and, believe it or not, Senior Citizens.
Little ones have few fears unless someone instilled them in them. I told the
parents of this age group that after the first day, it would be best for them to
leave so the child did not have that 'need to cling to mommy or daddy'.

Seniors? They may have had some phobias but they were wise enough to
listen and trust us.

[Gunny]

One of the worst things I had to do, as Senior Instructor at the TRACEN Gym, was telling a kid who was really
dedicated that he or she was not physically or mentally qualified to finish Basic Training.

The staff Corpsman and I (as a Physical Education major and Water Safety Instructor) would monitor
and evaluate each and every initial failure. We found one that slipped through MEPS and initial medical
screening that was born without the left pectoralis major muscle! I did not even let him take the initial swim test.
This lad really wanted to serve, but would have been a hazard to himself, let alone he could not pass most of the
initial physical screening. Our Chief sent him back to his CC (Drill Sgt to You) for recommendation for release from the service.

Just one example....kid had great motivation...but facts are facts.

Actually in some ways it was. The easiest age groups to teach initial swimming
are from 3-6 years years old: and, believe it or not, Senior Citizens.
Little ones have few fears unless someone instilled them in them. I told the
parents of this age group that after the first day, it would be best for them to
leave so the child did not have that 'need to cling to mommy or daddy'.

Seniors? They may have had some phobias but they were wise enough to
listen and trust us.

Some people are just stupid. You can't fix that. Even the ones who call themselves conservative and wouldn't know the meaning of the word if it landed on their heads. The people here in NM are anything BUT conservative. Kids who don't leave home until they're 30. People taking credit for doing shit they don't. No personal responsibility whatsoever. Yet, according to them, they are "conservatives". My dying ass. Not unless you shift the paradigm WAY left. Then it's everyone else's fault.

I can't believe this state is right next door to Texas. Crap. We're responsible for our own junk. I'm sick of self-serving whiners. There's a world out there. Get a damned clue.

[gabosaurus]

Gunny, dear, not every family throws their kids out on the street when they turn 18.
There are many cultures where you don't leave home until you get married. It's part of the "extended family" thing. You take care of your kids, and later they take care of you. If you aren't married, you contribute to the family unit.
Your extended life of hardship is not everyone's life. I know it is quite difficult for you to comprehend a non-military life, but you should give it a try sometime.

[Gunny]

Gunny, dear, not every family throws their kids out on the street when they turn 18.
There are many cultures where you don't leave home until you get married. It's part of the "extended family" thing. You take care of your kids, and later they take care of you. If you aren't married, you contribute to the family unit.
Your extended life of hardship is not everyone's life. I know it is quite difficult for you to comprehend a non-military life, but you should give it a try sometime.

Gabby dear, not everyone wants to suck off a tit forever. I'm an American and THAT is my culture and when we used to hold people responsible we got the f*ck out and assumed our own responsibilities. There's no extended life of hardship. I left home so I could live by my own rules, and not expect others to pay my way. Probably a novel ideal to you.

I comprehend a non-military life just fine. I'd rather be me than you. I can survive. You wouldn't know what to do if the power went off and would be waiting on some jackasses to save you.