Parenting 101

[Gunny]

Thank you, Gabby, that was so very nice.

Completely agree. Oldest granddaughter is the retard from Hell and a bully. The SIL just yells at her. I can get her to do anything with some positive reinforcement. Lot of dynamics involved in the situation and I have to back off lots. I am not the parent.

And FTR, I TOTALY disagree with drugging kids up. That annoys me to no end. Make them mind. It works.

[Kathianne]

Completely agree. Oldest granddaughter is the retard from Hell and a bully. The SIL just yells at her. I can get her to do anything with some positive reinforcement. Lot of dynamics involved in the situation and I have to back off lots. I am not the parent.

And FTR, I TOTALY disagree with drugging kids up. That annoys me to no end. Make them mind. It works.

I agree with a consistent discipline plan, whatever form it takes. More than anything else, kids need rules and expected consequences. I don't know anyone that thinks that 'drugging kids up' is a good idea.

I do think there are kids that need help that meds can provide. Of course if they've never had consistency, there are going to be problems with docs and the necessary tests to determine IF really necessary and WHAT problems are underlying if any.

With that said, I don't think the meds you refer to are in the same category as vaccinations, where I do think the government should take a stand on whether or not to allow a child into a school or public venue.

[gabosaurus]

And "exceptional" father? Not really. I'd love to say that, but the exceptional one is my wife. I still question myself every time. I still want to call Mom every single time I am afraid of something and need advice. Can't do that no more. I get stressed quite easy, and kids are tiny little stress balls that stick like glue and the law forces you to keep using them.

A boy will always relate more to his father. Especially when he has problems relating to vulnerability and insecurity.
What parent doesn't question themselves? I'm not adverse to calling my mom, my mother in law, my sister in law or anyone else I think might help me. I've even asked questions on this board.

You know I still can't stand you.

You are in good company, I am sure.

[Gunny]

I agree with a consistent discipline plan, whatever form it takes. More than anything else, kids need rules and expected consequences. I don't know anyone that thinks that 'drugging kids up' is a good idea.

I do think there are kids that need help that meds can provide. Of course if they've never had consistency, there are going to be problems with docs and the necessary tests to determine IF really necessary and WHAT problems are underlying if any.

With that said, I don't think the meds you refer to are in the same category as vaccinations, where I do think the government should take a stand on whether or not to allow a child into a school or public venue.

Were close to the same age and grew up with a different mindset. I am surprised however you are a school teacher and not up to snuff on drugging the kids. Answer for everything. It's also a mindset I do not understand that has been around since :Mother's Little Helper". I wont take pills period.

Back to the point, all of these people that believe in this therpy crap let their kids get put on meds. and they keep changing them. Then wonder why their kids are fruitloops.

Maybe these people that get paid to practice psychology should give it a try sometimes.

[gabosaurus]

Were close to the same age and grew up with a different mindset. I am surprised however you are a school teacher and not up to snuff on drugging the kids. Answer for everything. It's also a mindset I do not understand that has been around since :Mother's Little Helper". I wont take pills period.

Back to the point, all of these people that believe in this therpy crap let their kids get put on meds. and they keep changing them. Then wonder why their kids are fruitloops.

Maybe these people that get paid to practice psychology should give it a try sometimes.

If you were bipolar and suffered from clinical depression and anxiety, you would take medication. Or you wouldn't function in society.
You don't understand the mindset because it hadn't developed when you were growing up. My mother-in-law was bipolar and severely depressed when she was younger. Her parents just thought she was anti-social and disliked parental authority.
They used to treat this with shock treatments. Or just a lot of beatings and a lot of yelling and screaming. Doesn't work like that anymore.

[Gunny]

If you were bipolar and suffered from clinical depression and anxiety, you would take medication. Or you wouldn't function in society.
You don't understand the mindset because it hadn't developed when you were growing up. My mother-in-law was bipolar and severely depressed when she was younger. Her parents just thought she was anti-social and disliked parental authority.
They used to treat this with shock treatments. Or just a lot of beatings and a lot of yelling and screaming. Doesn't work like that anymore.

I got news for you, ma'am, I am the anxiety king of the word and I suffer clinical depression. I hate ALL authority and am anti-social to the nth degree. But I deal with it.

The one time an ex got me put on meds I went insane.I destroyed the inside of the garage and almost burned it down. I'd rather just make myself behave than put me on crap that makes me whacky as hell, I don't even remember doing any of that stuff. THAT scares me. I don't want to end up in prison for something I don'te even remember doing.

[Kathianne]

Were close to the same age and grew up with a different mindset. I am surprised however you are a school teacher and not up to snuff on drugging the kids. Answer for everything. It's also a mindset I do not understand that has been around since :Mother's Little Helper". I wont take pills period.

Back to the point, all of these people that believe in this therpy crap let their kids get put on meds. and they keep changing them. Then wonder why their kids are fruitloops.

Maybe these people that get paid to practice psychology should give it a try sometimes.

I'm well aware of kids that are medicated that likely shouldn't be, because it's easier for the parents than actually disciplining. I'm also aware of kids that do need medications to cope with, often overcome things like depression, anxiety, attention issues, etc., so they are able to grow up with self-discipline, a decent education, and learning to cope if necessary with getting help to not be controlled by an illness, anymore than someone should suffer the consequences of other illnesses without the necessary medications like insulin or antibiotics.

I'd rather someone be on the right medication for depression than be suicidal.

[gabosaurus]

I got news for you, ma'am, I am the anxiety king of the word and I suffer clinical depression. I hate ALL authority and am anti-social to the nth degree. But I deal with it.

The one time an ex got me put on meds I went insane.I destroyed the inside of the garage and almost burned it down. I'd rather just make myself behave than put me on crap that makes me whacky as hell, I don't even remember doing any of that stuff. THAT scares me. I don't want to end up in prison for something I don'te even remember doing.

If you are truly ill, you can't just "make yourself behave." You might believe you are, but those around you know otherwise.
You have to be diagnosed, evaluated, prescribed and monitor.
I do wish you would find help. I don't want you to end up dead for something you don't remember doing.

[Gunny]

If you are truly ill, you can't just "make yourself behave." You might believe you are, but those around you know otherwise.
You have to be diagnosed, evaluated, prescribed and monitor.
I do wish you would find help. I don't want you to end up dead for something you don't remember doing.

Sure you can. It's called self-discipline and knowing what the problem is. I'm from a different world than you are. Agree with it or not, discipline works. Unacceptable behavior is exactly that. Punishment for the crime works. And pain is a great motivator. How that pain is delivered and received depends on the person.

I think I spanked my daughter once and the old cliché ... did more damage to me than her. All I had to do was give a disapproving look to her and she was punished.

The younger daughter was terrified of me (because of her mom's BS). But to this day she has no sense of responsibility nd still literally lives in her mommy's basement. I didn't raise that one (I was Ash's only parent for years). I haven't had much to do with the younger since she was about 6 because the mom would try to use her to control me and all the BS her mother filled her head with. Nothing phases her. She's in the "entitled" group.

You earn what you get with me. I was dragging a lawn mower from the time I was 12 so I could get my own Levis instead of Wearing Sears Best.

We don't and/or are not allowed to teach our children personal responsibility anymore. You have to deal with people individually for what that they are. They all get cars. Rewind back to I was just after some jeans.

And if something is wrong? We'll give you a pill. Lot easier than taking responsibility for teaching your child. I taught my daughter to think and care. If that's my contribution to the planet, so be it.

[Gunny]

If you are truly ill, you can't just "make yourself behave." You might believe you are, but those around you know otherwise.
You have to be diagnosed, evaluated, prescribed and monitor.
I do wish you would find help. I don't want you to end up dead for something you don't remember doing.

Worst thing about doctors is they don't listen. They jump to conclusions. They already know and you can't say crap they'll listen to. I'm as smart as any doctor I've ever known. If you are going to not listen to me and just start prescribing wrote crap from a book, I don't need you. The best doctor I've ever known I slammed into the wall. And it isn't because she saved me so much as she handled the situation. I can appreciate that. She knew what she was doing.

If I had all the answers Missus Ma'am, I'd write me a book and be rich and famous. I don't like medication. Never have. Now does that mean I am a dumbass and would deny my kids medication like some goofballs do? No. And this could be a whole nother topic and I am up to snuff on medication. I'll leave this thread where it lays because it's about people.