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    Default forgiving assholes

    The part i like best

    "Forgiveness is about us. Maybe holding onto the evil or harm does not combat evil - maybe it feeds it."


    “… the greatest detractor from high performance is fear: fear that you are not prepared, fear that you are in over your head, fear that you are not worthy, and ultimately, fear of failure. If you can eliminate that fear—not through arrogance or just wishing difficulties away, but through hard work and preparation—you will put yourself in an incredibly powerful position to take on the challenges you face" - Pete Carroll.

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    1st step, stop thinking of the aholes as aholes. Easier said, . . .

    Resentments hurts the holder, not the recipient. I think that is my motivator. I also try to keep in mind how often I need to be forgiven, that helps.


    "The government is a child that has found their parents credit card, and spends knowing that they never have to reconcile the bill with their own money"-Shannon Churchill


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    God forgives, I don't.

    If someone killed say my mother, I'd do everything in my power to kill that sons a bitch, and forgiveness would never enter my mind.

    If someone stole something from me, forgiveness would never enter my mind.

    And it doesn't bother me a bit.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kathianne View Post
    1st step, stop thinking of the aholes as aholes. Easier said, . . .

    Resentments hurts the holder, not the recipient. I think that is my motivator. I also try to keep in mind how often I need to be forgiven, that helps.
    If you have become the things you hate the most in others, what have you become?

    The ting you hate the most.
    “When bad men combine, the good must associate; else they will fall, one by one, an unpitied sacrifice in a contemptible struggle.” Edumnd Burke

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gunny View Post
    If you have become the things you hate the most in others, what have you become?

    The ting you hate the most.
    "If."

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gunny View Post
    If you have become the things you hate the most in others, what have you become?

    The ting you hate the most.
    It seems most people are not self-reflective. Often they are doing what they accuse others of, yet never see it in themselves. In any case, getting pissed at them and holding onto it, well it won't bother them at all.


    "The government is a child that has found their parents credit card, and spends knowing that they never have to reconcile the bill with their own money"-Shannon Churchill


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    Quote Originally Posted by Kathianne View Post
    It seems most people are not self-reflective. Often they are doing what they accuse others of, yet never see it in themselves. In any case, getting pissed at them and holding onto it, well it won't bother them at all.
    That's alright Kathy, you can quote me and reply to me directly. No need to attempt at a side swipe.

    What is "self-reflective?" And are you accusing me of "doing what they accuse other's of?"

    Let me be clear, I'm talking about MURDERERS, RAPISTS, THIEVES, LIARS, ETC, yes, I hate these people, and no, I have zero forgiveness for them, but because I hate them you think I'm going to BECOME ONE OF THEM, or worse yet, I AM one of them?

    How utterly ridiculous.
    Last edited by High_Plains_Drifter; 06-06-2018 at 06:48 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by High_Plains_Drifter View Post
    That's alright Kathy, you can quote me and reply to me directly. No need to attempt at a side swipe.

    What is "self-reflective?" And are you accusing me of "doing what they accuse other's of?"

    Let me be clear, I'm talking about MURDERERS, RAPISTS, THIEVES, LIARS, ETC, yes, I hate these people, and no, I have zero forgiveness for them, but because I hate them you think I'm going to BECOME ONE OF THEM, or worse yet, I AM one of them?

    How utterly ridiculous.
    I wasn't talking about you or anyone in particular. I'm simply disgusted with society in general and the political divide in particular. It's dangerous, IMO. On the other hand, no, I don't expect a soul to change.


    "The government is a child that has found their parents credit card, and spends knowing that they never have to reconcile the bill with their own money"-Shannon Churchill


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    Quote Originally Posted by Kathianne View Post
    I wasn't talking about you or anyone in particular. I'm simply disgusted with society in general and the political divide in particular. It's dangerous, IMO. On the other hand, no, I don't expect a soul to change.
    OK... then I'm sorry for assuming you were talking to me.

    I'm a stand up guy, you'll always get the truth from me even it hurts or it's embarrassing, to me or anyone. I am NOT what I HATE, nor will I ever BECOME what I hate. I hate some people for a REASON, they're either CORRUPT or EVIL.

    I try to be the best person I can be, but forgiving a murderer or a rapist or a thief, just as examples, isn't in the cards. Right or wrong, I'll leave that to God.
    Last edited by High_Plains_Drifter; 06-06-2018 at 07:17 PM.

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    Some things are unforgivable. If not forgiving the person who molested me and my siblings mean I will have a dark spot on my soul, so be it.
    If the freedom of speech is taken away
    then dumb and silent we may be led,
    like sheep to the slaughter.


    George Washington (1732-1799) First President of the USA.

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    And won't forgive my mom for allowing the asshole to come back to live with us after he got out of jail.

    Some things just should not be forgiven.
    If the freedom of speech is taken away
    then dumb and silent we may be led,
    like sheep to the slaughter.


    George Washington (1732-1799) First President of the USA.

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    Quote Originally Posted by SassyLady View Post
    And won't forgive my mom for allowing the asshole to come back to live with us after he got out of jail.

    Some things just should not be forgiven.
    On all you've written, I agree. I especially agree about your mom, that is horrendous.

    That sort of experience, well the words are just not there, but unforgettable and life altering. At the same time, obviously you did not allow it to consume 'you.' The focus is on the perp and the enabler. I've no doubt you were hyper aware of adults, especially men around your children and now grandchildren.

    I'm referring to people that do not come to that level, indeed, they are not worthy of the time and effort to keep them in mind. They may be a 'friend' that betrays in some way; a boss that is unreasonable or threatened; an ex, who one no longer must deal with, those types.

    I certainly think being obsessed with someone we disagree with, no matter how strongly the disagreement is, wastes our time and in my case at least, raises my blood pressure to unmanageable levels. That is hurting me, not the object of my scorn or anger.


    "The government is a child that has found their parents credit card, and spends knowing that they never have to reconcile the bill with their own money"-Shannon Churchill


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    Quote Originally Posted by Kathianne View Post
    At the same time, obviously you did not allow it to consume 'you.'
    She didn't "become like them" either... just sayin...
    Last edited by High_Plains_Drifter; 06-06-2018 at 07:47 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by High_Plains_Drifter View Post
    She didn't "become like them" either... just sayin...
    and yet, there are few pedophiles that weren't abused themselves. It's never 'them.'

    I can't stop your feelings about what I write, that's not within my powers.


    "The government is a child that has found their parents credit card, and spends knowing that they never have to reconcile the bill with their own money"-Shannon Churchill


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    Quote Originally Posted by Kathianne View Post
    On all you've written, I agree. I especially agree about your mom, that is horrendous.

    That sort of experience, well the words are just not there, but unforgettable and life altering. At the same time, obviously you did not allow it to consume 'you.' The focus is on the perp and the enabler. I've no doubt you were hyper aware of adults, especially men around your children and now grandchildren.

    I'm referring to people that do not come to that level, indeed, they are not worthy of the time and effort to keep them in mind. They may be a 'friend' that betrays in some way; a boss that is unreasonable or threatened; an ex, who one no longer must deal with, those types.

    I certainly think being obsessed with someone we disagree with, no matter how strongly the disagreement is, wastes our time and in my case at least, raises my blood pressure to unmanageable levels. That is hurting me, not the object of my scorn or anger.
    Yes, I've actually been diagnosed with PTSD and hypervigilance from the abuse. Always watching interactions between children and adults.

    Also have participated on panels to educate the irrevocable harm sexual abuse can cause. Not everyone has the luxury of forgetting the abuse.
    If the freedom of speech is taken away
    then dumb and silent we may be led,
    like sheep to the slaughter.


    George Washington (1732-1799) First President of the USA.

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