When writing inter-office emails I write like I talk. Some folks rib-me saying it's not 'professional' - I contend speaking to people like people IS professional.

For instance - they start emails like this:

ALCON: Please be advised all personnel are required to attend the Organization BBQ IOT properly support the mission.

me:

Hey - Everyone must go to the bbq because #forcedfun

Their dumb email broken-down:

ALCON = (To) All those Concerned...
Be Advised = Get ready to listen to me because I am about to share information..here is that information.
All personnel = everyone.
Attend = show up
IOT = In Order To
Mission = Morale.

(shrug)

I won't change. Ever. I will not be a robot. Much.