I think when it's calculated like that, then she's a user. Calling herself a "traditionalist" is merely justifying her bad behavior to herself. Planning to date men of means was called gold-digging in my day.
For myself, if I ask a woman to dinner, THEN I am offering dinner. It's on me. However, I don't have to worry much about anyone confusing me of being a "man of means"
(unless they wear Levi's, work boots, pearl-snap shirts and ball caps nowadays).