Bottom line up front: Multiplayer games suck.
This is not a ‘remember the good-old days of gaming’ piece. This ranting isn’t directed at ‘a’ company. This ranting is complaining about the direction I see games going. On some levels, it could be about the ‘human condition’.….
Often I read game reviews conveying disappointment, or even disgust over a games lack of multiplayer options. I’ve seen ‘ratings’ from reviewers take significant drops over how - or if at all - a game works the option into its design.
Faulting a game over the “number of players allowed” tantamount to faulting a Corvette because it can’t seat four passengers. Do we fault football because only 11 players from each team are allowed on the field? I’ve never heard a sports writer slam the NBA because 5 players simply don’t allow for enough excitement.
Yet, in our gaming, we often use “Multiplayer” as the litmus test for a games worth.
“I really liked this game, but the lack of Multiplayer is a bit of a drawback, thus, only giving a 7 out of 10”.
I propose bringing back a time when a game stood on its playability, plot, graphics, and creativity. I would like very much to see games reviewed for how well the game executes its mission, rather docked scores based on how many people can participate. I’d love to read a review supporting a game-maker’s decision to NOT to charge you to play it, after you’ve already purchased the game.
I don’t enjoy online gaming. I don’t participate with Xbox live, or any of the other services; not because they are bad, but I can’t get into playing games against people I don’t know; or even those I know, but can’t see. Where is the ‘in your face’ finger when you are only chatting via a headset? Does Darin’s Chicken Dance™ after an 80 yard TD to Jerry Rice mean the same thing if nobody is around to see it? There is no fun in ‘rubbing it in the other guy’s face’ if you can’t ‘see’ the other guy’s face. I remember my parents’ frustration about me ‘wasting my life away’ in front of the ‘darn TV’ (back then, PCs hooked up to televisions ;-)). Perhaps rightly so, my parents were concerned about a lack of human interaction. That is happening today in the gaming world, lan-parties notwithstanding. Instead of inviting your pals over – let’s just hop online, and do battle without having to get dressed. Or shower. Not that any of ‘you’ lay around over the course of a weekend; only leaving bed to eat or removed eaten-food from your bowels.
Today ‘flaming’ has replaced Darin’s Chicken Dance™ as means of drawing attention to one’s gaming supremacy. Is it a wonder today’s kids are fatter than ever? No kid ever got fat dancing and jiving his day way, at the expense of his friends’ loosing efforts at River Raid. Today “Banning” somebody from an online session has replaced ‘I’m taking my game and going home!’. We are teaching our kids to simply run from adversity – or switch-off the game. “Oops! My internet has crashed!”. Back when people actually were in the same room, looking at the same screen, players were forced to defend their honour the old-fashioned way - putting the braggart in a Headlock.
I’m Darin…and I’m not wearing pants. If you were here, and not online, you’d know if I were kidding.