An Older Guy Than Me Sent This To Me

[Sitarro]

Funny but also with a great deal of truth.

New Direction for the war on terrorists.

Send Service Vets over 60

I am over 60 and the Armed Forces think I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing ass backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.

For starters:

Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry. We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some asshole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.

An 18 -year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m. Old guys always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-bitch.

If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brain teaser.
Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at, and we're used t o soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.

They could lighten up on the obstacle course, however. I've been in combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training. I can hear the Drill Sgt. in the New army now, Get down and give me ... ER ... one.

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.

An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.

These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.

Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see right now is a couple of million pissed-off old farts with attitude and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them.

If nothing else, put us on border patrol...we will have it secured the first night!

[Psychoblues]

I'll do all I can to get you the waiver you so desparately desire, guffy. The troops need volunteers like you to kick some real ass so they can get back to their real jobs and raising their real families. You've obviously done poorly in these accounts so maybe you can justify your existence in this last interest of yours and pursue this endeavor that you find so intriquing.

My GOD, you look so handsome in UNIFORM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Sitarro]

My GOD, you look so handsome in UNIFORM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Go flirt with one of your redneck gay blades at the track and leave me out of your sick fantasies....... fag.

[Psychoblues]

You are such a Pussie, zero!!!!!!!

Go flirt with one of your redneck gay blades at the track and leave me out of your sick fantasies....... fag.

Or, is your pussycat avatar meant to be less revealing?

[Pale Rider]

You are such a Pussie, zero!!!!!!!

Or, is your pussycat avatar meant to be less revealing?

Shut the fuck up moron.

[82Marine89]

My GOD, you look so handsome in UNIFORM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Go flirt with one of your redneck gay blades at the track and leave me out of your sick fantasies....... fag.

Yup. Psycoblewsomeguy loves a man in uniform.

[namvet]

hey Psychoblues take a break. you don't have to be a prick everyday of your stinking misreable rotton life