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  1. #1
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    Default Jenny Craig For Men

    A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program.

    The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a
    voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike
    running shoes and a sign around her neck.

    She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.

    The sign reads, 'If you can catch me, you can have me.'

    Without a second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later huffing
    and puffing, he finally gives up..

    The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens.

    On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10
    lbs. as promised.

    He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program.

    The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning,
    beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is wearing nothing
    but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, 'If you
    catch me you can have me'.

    Well, he's out the door after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent
    shape and he does his best, but no such luck. So for the next four days, the
    same routine happens with him gradually getting in better and better shape.

    Much to his delight on the fifth day when he weighs himself, he discovers
    that he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised. He decides to go for broke and
    calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program

    'Are you sure?' asks the representative on the phone.. 'This is our most
    rigorous program.'

    'Absolutely,' he replies, 'I haven't felt this good in years.'

    The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds a
    huge muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and
    a sign around his neck that reads, 'If I catch you, you're mine.'

    He lost 63 pounds that week.


    How do you tell a communist? Well, it's someone who reads Marx and Lenin. And how do you tell an anti-Communist? It's someone who understands Marx and Lenin.

    Ronald Reagan

  2. #2
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    Talking





    I was on Jenny Craig once.



    She kept screaming, "Get off me, ya fat bastard!"



  3. #3
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by hortysir View Post




    I was on Jenny Craig once.



    She kept screaming, "Get off me, ya fat bastard!"


    You know you need to diet when you get your shoes shined, and you have to take the kids word for it


    How do you tell a communist? Well, it's someone who reads Marx and Lenin. And how do you tell an anti-Communist? It's someone who understands Marx and Lenin.

    Ronald Reagan

  4. #4
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by hortysir View Post




    I was on Jenny Craig once.



    She kept screaming, "Get off me, ya fat bastard!"


    UNITED STATES ARMY AVIATION

    Above the Best

    Why the Hell should I have to press “1” for ENGLISH?

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