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  1. #1
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    Default One for the boys

    A jumbo jet is making its final approach to Tampa Airport. The pilot comes on the intercom, 'This is your Captain. We're on our final descent into Tampa I want to thank you for flying with us today and hope you enjoy your stay in the Tampa Bay area'.

    He forgets to switch off the intercom. Now the whole plane can hear his conversation from the cockpit.

    The copilot can be heard saying to the pilot, 'So, Skip, whatcha got planned while we're in Tampa ?'

    'Well,' says the skipper, 'first I'm gonna check into the hotel, take a big crap....then I'm gonna take that new stewardess with the huge tits out for dinner.... I 'm gonna wine and dine her, take her back to my room and give her a ride on the baloney pony all night long.'

    Aghast and amused, everyone on the plane hears this and immediately begins looking up and down the aisle, trying to figure out who this new stewardess is that the pilot's talking about.

    Meanwhile, the new stewardess is seated at the very back of the plane. She is so embarrassed that she starts running toward the cockpit to turn the intercom off. Halfway down the aisle, she trips over an old lady's bag and down she goes.

    The old lady leans over and says: 'No need to hurry, dear. He's gotta land the plane and take a shit first.
    He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God.AeschylusRead more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/qu...zeMUwcpY1Io.99

  2. #2
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    Quote Originally Posted by logroller View Post
    A jumbo jet is making its final approach to Tampa Airport. The pilot comes on the intercom, 'This is your Captain. We're on our final descent into Tampa I want to thank you for flying with us today and hope you enjoy your stay in the Tampa Bay area'.

    He forgets to switch off the intercom. Now the whole plane can hear his conversation from the cockpit.

    The copilot can be heard saying to the pilot, 'So, Skip, whatcha got planned while we're in Tampa ?'

    'Well,' says the skipper, 'first I'm gonna check into the hotel, take a big crap....then I'm gonna take that new stewardess with the huge tits out for dinner.... I 'm gonna wine and dine her, take her back to my room and give her a ride on the baloney pony all night long.'

    Aghast and amused, everyone on the plane hears this and immediately begins looking up and down the aisle, trying to figure out who this new stewardess is that the pilot's talking about.

    Meanwhile, the new stewardess is seated at the very back of the plane. She is so embarrassed that she starts running toward the cockpit to turn the intercom off. Halfway down the aisle, she trips over an old lady's bag and down she goes.

    The old lady leans over and says: 'No need to hurry, dear. He's gotta land the plane and take a shit first.

    :rofl:

  3. #3
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    Default

    Near an dear!
    UNITED STATES ARMY AVIATION




    Above the Best



    Why the Hell should I have to press “1” for ENGLISH?

  4. #4
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    A girl goes into the doctor and asks, "how many calories are in sperm?"
    to which the doctor replies,"if you swallow it doesn't matter if you're fat."
    He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God.AeschylusRead more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/qu...zeMUwcpY1Io.99

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    Why do black widow spiders kill their males after mating?
    To stop the snoring before it starts.
    If the freedom of speech is taken away
    then dumb and silent we may be led,
    like sheep to the slaughter.


    George Washington (1732-1799) First President of the USA.

  6. #6
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    Why are blonde jokes so short?
    So men can remember them.
    If the freedom of speech is taken away
    then dumb and silent we may be led,
    like sheep to the slaughter.


    George Washington (1732-1799) First President of the USA.

  7. #7
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    The other day the misses asked me "when you're on a guys trip, do you think about me?"
    Apparently, "only to keep from coming too fast" was the wrong answer.
    He who learns must suffer. And even in our sleep pain that cannot forget falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our own despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God.AeschylusRead more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/qu...zeMUwcpY1Io.99

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    Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet?
    Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
    If the freedom of speech is taken away
    then dumb and silent we may be led,
    like sheep to the slaughter.


    George Washington (1732-1799) First President of the USA.

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