OK I got the ol satellite and running again ( yup just in time for football ) Saturday will be college and Sunday will be flipping back and forth between the games and the race, life is good.
OK I got the ol satellite and running again ( yup just in time for football ) Saturday will be college and Sunday will be flipping back and forth between the games and the race, life is good.
Never look down on someone unless you are helping them up
“You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named "Bush", "Dick", and "Colin." Need I say more?” - Chris Rock
Now don't be silly, Ms. Perianne!! Got a joke for you...
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A guy dies and goes straight to hell. His first day the devil comes around and asks, "Well buddy is it hot enough for ya down here?" The guy replies, "Aw, Ahm from Texas. We get hotter days than this in Houston in the springtime." This pisses the devil off so he goes over and turns the thermostat up. Next day it's the same thing: "Is it hot enough for ya now Tex?" And the Texan says, "Aw, we get hotter days than this in Del Rio in the wintertime." Pissed off again, the devil turns up the thermostat some more. So it goes day after day. The devil asks if its hot enough for the Texan, the Texan names another Texas city that's hotter than hell, and the devil turns up the temperature some more.
After a while the fires are really roarin', the smoke is blowin', and the brimstone is boilin'. One Sunday morning the the devil asks again how Tex likes the weather. Tex says, "Aw, the smoke and the fire don't bother me. I used to live over on the east side of Dallas by an oil refinery. And the stink ain't no problem. When the wind blew in from Pasadena, it was a lot worse than down here. So if ya could just get the temperature up a little higher, raise the humidity up to 100%, throw in a hurricane and a storm surge and half a dozen tornados and 57 trillion mosquitos as big as turkey buzzards... why, I thing I could be as comfortable here as I was back home in Dallas. That really pissed the devil off and he went to turn the thermostat up again.
BUT, it was already all the way up, and heat didn't seem to bother Tex anyway. There was only one thing to do: he turned the thermostat ALL THE WAY DOWN! The temperature started fallin' like a stone. By evening it was COLD! So he went to see the Dallas man. The guy was obviously miserable, coated in ice, blue and shiverin', with ice hanging from his ears. This pleased the devil 'cause he's in the torment business. He sneers at the man from Dallas and asks "Well Tex, how do ya like this weather?" Tex is shiverin' so hard he can hardly talk. He says, "Can't really say I care for it much." Then he gives the devil a great big smile and says "But I guess it's worth it." The devil says, "What the hell you mean 'It's worth it'? And why are you so damned happy?" The Dallas man replies, "Well with hell bein' froze over and all, it must mean Tony Romo finally won the Super Bowl!"
“You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named "Bush", "Dick", and "Colin." Need I say more?” - Chris Rock
Tony Romo died.
When he got to Heaven, God was showing him around. They came to a modest little house with a faded Cowboys flag in the window.
"This house is yours for eternity, Tony", said God. "This is very special; not everyone gets a house up here."
Tony felt special and walked up to his house. On his way to the porch, he noticed another house.
It was a 3-story mansion with a Black and Gold sidewalk, a 50 foot tall flagpole with an enormous Steeler flag, and in every window, a Terrible Towel hung.
Tony looked at God and said, "God, I'm not trying to be ungrateful, but, why does Ben Roethlisberger get a better house than me?"
God chuckled, and said "Tony, that's not Ben's house, it's mine."
“You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named "Bush", "Dick", and "Colin." Need I say more?” - Chris Rock
“You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named "Bush", "Dick", and "Colin." Need I say more?” - Chris Rock