Learning How to Debate

[Dilloduck]

I can mention something about my family, you don't get to use it against me in a debate. My family is off limits to you.

Whatever----do what you need to win.

[Wind Song]

Whatever----do what you need to win.

I do not mention family in order to "win". I never win an argument here. I mentioned it because it speaks to my passion on certain topics.



There will be no flaming of another members family, whether directly or indirectly. This applies to all sections of the board, private messages and reputation comments. If the family member is not here to defend themselves, then they should not be attacked in any manner. Even if a member discusses their own family, they remain off limits.

[jimnyc]

If a member brings up their family member, they are now open to the discussion - but they are not open to flaming or being belittled. But someone cannot come here, use a family member as part of a post, and then expect the community to ignore the post. Discussion if the member brought them up is ok - flaming is not ok.

[Wind Song]

That's not how the rule reads.

Even if a member discusses their own family, they remain off limits.






From now on, I will NEVER talk about my wife, my father or any other family history. The rule didn't appear to make my family an open topic if I happen to mention them.

[DragonStryk72]

I'm not using my father's death as "debate leverage". I'm using it to show why I'm so sensitive to these derogatory terms.

It's background for the burden I carry. It speaks to my motivation, my loyalty to my father and my committment to not put up with predjudicial bullshit.

I lost my father to hate. I only mentioned your father, who is alive and well, (I'm happy to hear) to show that our experiences as children of gay men are different.

I do take your point, and I see why you think I'm "guilt tripping'. It isn't my intention. It shows my vulnerability and sensitivity are related to something as core and important as the loss of my father.

And we already know about your dad. You didn't explain anything, put any context at all, just "Your dad is alive. Mine isn't." That's it, that's everything people had to read on the subject. Even now, we're discussing that instead of the topic

I know what it's like from my own experiences at being bullied growing up to be the subject of mass ridicule. I was the shortest, scrawniest, and smartest kid in my class, and I was almost constantly reading something or other, whether it be The Hobbit, Charlotte's Web, or a book on Volcanoes, I was almost always reading. I aced tests I didn't even study for, and passed classes only doing enough homework to not get my parents on my case. I took beatings, numerous ones, and when I got switched into a catholic school for junior high, it turned to pure verbal abuse. Only now, because I was playing Dungeons & Dragons, I was getting called a Satan worshipper because people for idiotic reason believe that the game involved summoning the devil to play it. Even in high school, when I switched over to Catholic High, I was still a geek, and the friends at school I had were the other outcasts of the school. From Kindergarten to 12th grade, I was the continually bullied, verbally and physically.

However, the reason I mention this is important to what I'm getting across to you: Most people have been through horrible things, but it isn't about the things that happen, it is how we handle them, and what we do with those experiences that defines us.

[jimnyc]

If you cannot comprehend the rules and what they are meant to prevent happening, that's not our problem. But it's easily resolved, if you don't want anyone in your family being discussed on this board, then don't bring them up on this board.

[Aeryn Sun]

Debating is gay.

[jimnyc]

And we already know about your dad. You didn't explain anything, put any context at all, just "Your dad is alive. Mine isn't."

You done broke the rules!!!

[logroller]

That's not how the rule reads.

Even if a member discusses their own family, they remain off limits.






From now on, I will NEVER talk about my wife, my father or any other family history.

WHat section did that rule come from...the flaming section. Its best not to cherry facts, especially from a resource so easily verified.

Flaming...There will be no flaming of another members family, whether directly or indirectly. This applies to all sections of the board, private messages and reputation comments. If the family member is not here to defend themselves, then they should not be attacked in any manner. Even if a member discusses their own family, they remain off limits.

[Wind Song]

if you cannot comprehend the rules and what they are meant to prevent happening, that's not our problem. But it's easily resolved, if you don't want anyone in your family being discussed on this board, then don't bring them up on this board.

from now on i will never discuss any personal details or bring up my family again.

[Wind Song]

WHat section did that rule come from...the flaming section. Its best not to cherry facts, especially from a resource so easily verified.

Excuse me. I quoted the rules.

[jimnyc]

That's correct, Log:

Flaming...There will be no flaming of another members family, whether directly or indirectly. This applies to all sections of the board, private messages and reputation comments. If the family member is not here to defend themselves, then they should not be attacked in any manner. Even if a member discusses their own family, they remain off limits.

Very clearly refers to FLAMING. This rule in no way was intended to allow someone to mention their family members whenever they want and other members can't reply.

[jimnyc]

from now on i will never discuss any personal details or bring up my family again.

I really don't give a shit if you do or if you don't.

[Wind Song]

I can see that being a real person here isn't how you guys debate. I will not bring up any personal details again. No anecdotes or stories.

[jimnyc]

I can see that being a real person here isn't how you guys debate. I will not bring up any personal details again. No anecdotes or stories.

Being real is NOT acting like you were just giving a beating because someone referenced a family member - a family member that YOU just brought up in the prior post. Here we go again, you say something, someone replies, and now you're a victim again. Just like fucking clockwork, and meanwhile, not a negative thing was spoken to you about family.